Newman's Narratives

Extra Short Story: Poor Steve

2010-12-17T22:24:00.000-05:00

Here's a random mini-Buffyverse story I put together. Thoughts welcome.

Steve never felt so alive. Power, is what he thought, power is what he was feeling. He had never felt this way before. He was stronger than ever and ready to take on the world. How did he get here, Steve wondered as he began to open his eyes. That's when he realized - he was trapped, trapped in a box. He had no idea what happened, he was frightened, he tried to remember how he got there as he began to bash his wooden cell.

He remembered a girl. A cute girl he met at a bar. She was leggy and blonde, and she seemed to throw herself at him. He couldn't remember her name - it was something musical, though. They flirted at the bar and she whispered into Steve's ear, "Let's go someplace more quiet." Her idea of more quiet was the alleyway behind the bar. She began kissing his neck, which led to her nibbling on his neck. It tickled at first - before she handed Steve a flask and said, "Drink, now." Steve drank a sip from the flask - a warm liquid that tasted like iron. That's when the biting got deeper and Steve went black.

He continued to bang on the wooden box and finally busted through the top. As dirt rained into the box, Steve pulled himself out. He shook himself off and looked around - he was in a graveyard, incredibly disoriented, and wearing an awful powder blue suit. That said, he still felt strong, powerful, but never more confused. He looked around, that's when he saw the gravestone behind him. There was his name, there was the date - the day of his bar visit.

Steve remained confused as he thought he saw someone coming towards him. He yelled out, "Hello there," and waved towards them. That's when he got a sudden hunger, an intense hunger that he had never felt before. It was more than a craving, it was a need. Steve needed blood - and he needed it now.

Steve looked up and thought that whoever this was would be the first meal of his new life as whatever he was. That's the last thing Steve remembered as he turned to dust.

---------------------------------------------------------

As Buffy walked away from the pile of Steve dust she thought to herself, "What a pity, they had to bury him in that terrible suit."

The Emerald Reich: Part III

2010-12-16T22:27:00.002-05:00

I posted the first two parts of the story 2 years ago, here's the next section.

Part 7: The Rose and the Seed
(Amy is sitting in a futon holding her head tightly; the room is cave-like and unadorned otherwise)
Amy: Ahh, oooh no.
(Pan around to a door, viewer can see the door open and Tails enters)
Tails: (Runs over to Amy and puts his arm around her) Are you all right?
Amy: (Shakes her head) No, my head it feels like there’s pressure all around.
Tails: (Show his head, arms still around her, mostly show the top of her head. He’s thinking this) Wow, the transport back to this world has been rough on Amy’s body. The poor girl. (Show the two of them entirely) It’s going to be ok. Doctor Bean will be coming soon.
(Skip to the main door of the Castle of Acorn, it opens and Bean the Dynamite enters. He’s dressed as a doctor, with the cliché Doctor’s costume. He walks forward, being greeted by King Acorn himself)
Acorn: Welcome back, Doctor.
Bean: Thank you, your highness. It’s good to be back. (the two walk into the throne room and you see Shadow and Sonic standing there talking)
Acorn: Dr. Bean, you know Sonic, and this one is Shadow the Hedgehog his friend.
Bean: Pleasure to meet you (he nods)
Shadow: Charmed, I’m sure.
Acorn: (Show Acorn pointing towards a side room) Our friend Amy has still been feeling a bit of pain in her forehead, the stabbing headaches have not gone away and in fact have intensified since the last time you visited.
Bean: (See Bean nod) All right, take me too her, there must not be something deeper here.
(Acorn and Bean walk off)
(Shadow takes Sonic aside)
Shadow: What do you know of this Doctor?
Sonic: He’s a good warrior and from the way I see it a good Doctor. Haven’t heard a complaint yet.
Shadow: (Show Shadow with concern as he speaks) Does that not strike you as odd?
Sonic: (Looks puzzled) What do you mean?
Shadow: (Shakes his head) Me and my people will look into this Dr. Bean, he seems a bit…never mind. (Acorn and Bean return to the main area)
Sonic: How’s she doing?
Bean: She’ll be all right, I’ve given her a sedative shot which I believe will do the trick. She’s sleeping now.
(See Tails walk out of the room after them, Zoom in on him. Tails is smiling and whispers)
Tails: Sleep well, sleeping beauty.
(Show group talking with Tails walking over)
Shadow: Acorn tells me that the former army commander has gone missing. Doctor, have you seen him?
Bean: No, I have not seen Kodos in months.
Shadow: Have you seen any of the Eggman’s creations, minions, lately?
Bean: No, why do you ask?
Acorn: (Looks angered) Where did this inquiry come from?
Shadow: (He slinks back slightly) No reason, just curious, (He looks at Acorn) it is my job to be curious. (He vanishes in a brilliant light).
Bean: What a strange hedgehog…(He has a slightly angered look on his face)
Acorn: (Acorn says with a smile) Yes, but he is excellent at what he does (Acorn begins to lead Bean away saying) Let me show you the new study I have just set up for myself it’s…
Sonic: (In the foreground as they walk away)
Sonic: (Show Sonic looking upwardly shaking his head, thinking) What are you thinking, Shadow?

Part 8: Enter the Chaotix
(See Mighty the Armadillo standing in front of a white board. On it is written “Knuckles.”)
Mighty: (Hands behind his back as he speaks) Members of the Chaotix. (Pan out to show the group as seen from behind Mighty. Group includes Vector the Crocodile, Charmy the Bee, Espio the Chameleon, Rouge the Bat and Big the Cat) According to our sources, there is a threat on the life of our friend Knuckles.
Espio: (Standing) Well, we need to do something about this.
(Group tends to nod in agreement)
Mighty: (Smiling) I’d hope you’d say that. (Cut to an empty version of the Echidna Congress room from Part 2. We see Knuckles’ head chair with the Tapestry behind it. Mighty is speaking over the images) Here is the tapestry which symbolizes the might and justice of Angel Island. (Move to above it and to the right) Here is a corridor which runs above it. (Back to the room with the Chaotix, start on Vectors face and pan across the group as Mighty speaks) This used to be used years ago for the press to visit meetings and take notes. A bill passed some four years ago, closing these corridors to the public, but they still can pose a threat to our friend. (Zoom in on Mighty’s face) This will be going on tomorrow at the meeting, we move then.
(Cut to see Knuckles walking down the hallway and the main room for the Congressional meetings can be seen in the distance. Over this Mighty says, “And I doubt Knuckles even suspects a thing.”)

Part 9: Parliamentary Procedure
(Show Knuckles walk in and then sit down in his seat at the forefront of the Echidna Congress, Leba is sitting at the seat directly to his right)
Knuckles: (He pounds on his gavel) This meeting of the Echidna House of Guardians has been called to order. (Zoom in on his face, it is slightly angled as he speaks to the group) Today we are here to discuss the current state of our nation.
Cain: (Cain stands up) If you don’t mind, I’d like to say a few words. (Show Knuckles nod) I feel that we should…
(Cut to Vector and Charmy moving through a dark corridor, each have headsets on and appear to be moving fast)
Vector: V and C to base, we’re on the trail, hopefully we’ll get to him before he gets to his target.
Voice: (Coming from the headset) Affirmative V, protect Knuckles my friend.
(Cut to an Echidna dressed entirely in black, he’s pointing a rifle downward. See him look through the sight on the rifle and seen as through the point of view of the weapon Cain talking, then move over to Knuckles sitting down. Zoom back out to the room, seeing Knuckles nodding his head and Leba turn his upward. Show the Echidna in black and see Leba stand. Cut back to Vector and Charmy who appear to be getting very close to the black suited Echidna, then cut back to the zoom out of the room and see the Echidna fire. Leba screams, “NO!” and stands in front of Knuckles, being shot through the heart).
Leba: (Falls and screams)
Knuckles: (Stands up and looks up) Send someone up there. (Frantically) Find out who did this!
(Cut to Vector and Charmy, they reach to where the assassin was, and all they find is the rifle. Vector grabs the rifle and looks around, pointing it in the direction of where he’s looking as he goes)
Vector: (To Charmy) Shit, we missed him.
(See Echidna soldiers running up flights of stairs)
(Cut to Leba in the arms of Cain)
Cain: (Crying as he speaks) If it were not for my jealousy.
Leba: (Puts his hand on Cain’s face) I forgive you brother for not noticing him…(Leba falls dead in Cain’s arms)
Cain: (Shakes his head and holds his brother close) No. NO!
(Cut back to the Echidna soldiers, they have pikes pointed down the hallway)
Echidna_Soldier: (Calling down towards Vector and Charmy) Drop your weapons, we have you surrounded. (Vector drops the rifle throwing up his arms as he looks towards the Echidnas, who surround both Charmy and him. Charmy also puts up his arms and looks up at Vector)
Charmy: (Looks back at the Echidna Soldiers) You have the wrong people, Mack. The real killer is getting away.
(Echidna Soldiers cuff the two of them)
Soldier: Tell that to the judge. (It ends with Vector and Charmy being walked off in cuffs by 5 Echidna Soldiers)
(Cut to Mighty and Espio. Both are nearby a computer in chairs, Espio has a headset on and is holding his hand to his forehead spine. Mighty throws a headset to the ground).

I Love You More

2009-12-24T14:39:00.002-05:00

Stevie Wonder wrote a great Christmas song for the 5th "Very Special Christmas" album. The lyrics display a wonderful love of Christ at Christmas. Read them and enjoy. Merry Christmas.

More than I love the first of spring,
I love you more.
More than the sweetest song I sing,
I love you more.
More than the Christmas bells that ring,
I love you more my Lord.

More than a star filled summer's night,
I love you more.
More awe than viewing a wondrous sight,
I love you more.
More than the Chirstmas cards I write,
I love you more my Lord.

More than the days, more than the nights,
More than seasons and reasons for every life,
More is my love for Jesus Christ,
And my God who made it all.

More than the autumn's falling leaves,
I love you more.
More than snowflakes dancing in the breeze,
I love you more.
Much more than Santa and Christmas trees,
I love you more, my Lord.

SW: Mistletoes and everything wow
Christmas just as I pictured it
KB: Mistletoes and everything wow
SW: Champagne, Pineapple juice

More than the days, more than the nights,
More than seasons and reasons for every life,
More is my love for Jesus Christ,
And my God who made it all.

More than the autumn's falling leaves,
I love you more.
More than snowflakes dancing in the breeze,
I love you more.
Much more than Santa and Christmas trees,
I love you more, my Lord.

With every single breath of life you give me,
I love you more.
More than I love the first of spring,
I love you more.
More than the sweetest song I sing,
I love you more, Lord, I love you more.

Biblical Films

2009-12-23T13:38:00.004-05:00

I have come up with a few random ideas for movies based on Biblical stories that I think would intrigue and interest the general public. Why? Because a) they hadn't thought of these stories and b) the stories are compelling / visually interesting. Here are my ideas including suggested film titles.

The Judge - This would be a film chronicling part of the story of the Biblical Judge, Gideon. What part of his life story? The fighting of the Mideonites and the vengeance he sought from the kings who killed his brothers. Gideon's well crafted battle plans allowed his small band to scare and confuse the Mideonites in the middle of the night. In so doing, they were able to force them to flee and be cut off by a larger group of Israelites. The sneak attack and ensuing battle could be epic if filmed properly. Follow this with Gideon's tracking down of the enemy kings to avenge the death of his brothers could make for an incredibly compelling movie. The History Channel's Bible Battles does a great job describing the event and helping you to visualize it.

My Revelation - Revelation written by John of Patmos, at the end of the New Testament has been attempted to be interpreted by many for years. I say, why interpret. Instead - make a full length motion picture visualizing the entire book of Revelation on screen. Try to help people understand John of Patmos was seeing and let them interpret it as they will. I think a film like this should begin with John on Patmos shaking while sitting at a desk. You look about the room and see a dark, cave-like room in shambles. John then takes some paper and a pen, and begins to write to the new Churches. Then begin with his visions and visualize the entire thing on screen. That's it. Don't try to tell us what the film creators think Revelation is about - make it as detailed and as accurate to the text as possible. Again, no interpretation - just literal visualization of the book. I think that will marvel many with the intense imagery of Revelation.

Reluctantly Condemned - The story of Jonah is one of the more well known stories of the Bible. But, most of us only remember parts of the story. If I were to make a film regarding Jonah, I would begin by showing the fire and brimstone style preacher giving a sermon. A fiery sermon about how evil sin is and how evil sinners will be condemned by the Lord. Then as he leaves, introduce God directly confronting him and telling him to go to Ninevah. Jonah then goes on the run trying to hide from God. But, of course, God finds him and Jonah eventually does what the Lord required of him. The story is the interesting tale of a reluctant preacher who did not want to go to where God wanted him to go. His story is relatable. The problem? The Book of Jonah ends aburptly, so in a film format it would be difficult to have an ending. Then again - it may almost be worth having the film end with a dumbfounded Jonah listening to the Lord explaining what he should have known in the first place.

Thoughts on my 3 ideas are always welcome. In each case, I'd be talking about a live action film.

Albums I'm Looking For

2009-12-19T13:16:00.005-05:00

For my own reference - I've put together a list of albums that I'm interested in hearing and potentially picking up.

Cage the Elephant - Cage the Elephant
Kelly Clarkson - All I Ever Wanted
Crush 40 - Crush 40
Dr. Dre - The Chronic
John Frusciante - The Empyrean
Jurassic 5 - Power in Numbers
Muse - The Resistance
Royksopp - Junior

Thoughts on other albums I should look into?

My Brother's Killer

2009-10-18T13:51:00.000-04:00

I am uncertain how to write this into a detailed story - but here's the idea for a Civil War era story entitled "My Brother's Killer."

Two brothers from Maryland end up on opposite sides in the United States Civil War. The story follows the Union brother, James Davis. James felt that the war needed to be fought to end slavery. His brother felt that slavery was a red herring and that the real battle was between the rights of the states and the power of the federal government.

James joins the 1st Regiment Cavalry out of Baltimore early on in the conflict. In his first battle, James kills a number of men in battle. As he charges forward with his unit and finds that one of the fallen Confederates in the battle is his brother.

After the war, with a heavy conscience, James leaves Maryland and in 1866, he ends up in Oklahoma territory. There he sees attrocities performed by Union solders. He defends local Native Americans and after joining them one night discovers that their tribe sided with the Confederates in the Civil War.

The story follows a man torn and confused. He feels pain and disgust in himself and no longer supports the cause that led him to kill his brother. I'm unsure how to end this story. Part of me had the idea of him joining the Native American tribe and dying with them in a guerilla attack on a Union barracks, but I'm unsure.

Thoughts are welcome. Again, this is only the beginning and bare skeleton of a story.

Random Music Video Ideas

2009-09-18T14:41:00.000-04:00

Recently I've been coming up with random ideas while listening to music - about how I would present the song in music video format. Here's a spattering of ideas I had for a few randomly selected songs.

Katy Perry - One of the Boys
The video would be a classic teenage girl falling for the popular boy music video...except the girl would be played by a dude and the popular boy she's into, is actually Katy Perry dressed as a boy with a very bad fake moustache. Preferably have other male musicians that she's close to / worked with (FOB, Gym Class Heroes) to play other girls in school. The video would be mostly a daydream of the tomboy about how she (played by a he) is a tomboy, treated like a sister, but wants to be treated like a girly-girl.

Michael Jackson - Smooth Criminal
I would make this actually a realistic depiction of what's going on in the song. The song would open with a girl sitting at home watching TV in her living room. It then shifts over to a window being forced open, then comes the intruder into the apartment. A friend of hers is on his way to visit when all this is going on - so, it goes back and forth between him looking at the apartment from the outside, to her struggle / attack from the intruder. He then realizes as he's trying to call her from outside that something isn't right and gets in the apartment just as the intruder is jumping out the window. This could be a very scary video with realistic depiction of Annie getting struck by the intruder and her friend trying to save her, but coming just that much too late. It ends with the friend comforting Annie as the police arrive.

My Chemical Romance - Cancer
Video would begin with the intro tune playing very quietly and see a younger, but obviously sick lead singer of the band lying in a hospital bed asleep. Two people are standing next to him, one holding his hand and the other rubbing the one person's shoulder and just looking at him. One says to the other, "I don't know if he'll make it." That's when the lyrics begin with the person slightly waking up and singing. When he gets to the line "favorite colors" it goes to him in his gown watching the events happening and singing, with the version of him in bed just laying there and the family members crying. The next verse will go back and forth between the ghostly lead singer singing the song in the hospital to the family members wearing all black in mourning, and in the funeral procession. The video would end with the ghostly version of him walking over and pulling a plug out from the wall, with the version of him in bed dying. The music stops and the machine's flatline. You see the family members begin to cry and a happy ghostly version of the lead singer walk off into a bright light.

Michael Jackson - Billie Jean
Begins by showing a speech by John Edwards on a television screen, then back off to show someone dressed as John Edwards walking past a television store. He's lip syncing the song. As the video progresses, it goes back and forth between flashbacks and John Edwards walking sadly down this road. The flashbacks include meeting Rielle Hunter, telling his wife about the affair, and watching his Presidential hopes crashing and burning through a flurry of news coverage. This video would almost serve as a chronicle of the fall of John Edwards from the good graces of the mainstream / liberal media and his continued denial to be the father of Rielle Hunter's baby.

Playlist of the Moment

2009-09-18T14:19:00.003-04:00

I decided to randomly post the current "On-The-Go" playlist from my iPod that I'm currently listening to on my rides into / from work -

Drake - The Calm
Drake - Fear
Fuel - Hemorrhage
Fuel - Shimmer
Gorillaz - Clint Eastwood
Gym Class Heroes - New Friend Request
Gym Class Heroes - The Queen and I
Hard-Fi - Cash Machine
Insane Clown Posse - Juggalo Homies
Insane Clown Posse - Under The Moon
Insane Clown Posse - How Many Times?
Jack's Mannequin - The Mixed Tape
Jack's Mannequin - Hammers and Strings (A Lullaby)
Kid Rock - Wasting Time
Lemon Demon - The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny
mc chris - The Tussin
My Chemical Romance - Welcome to the Black Parade
My Chemical Romance - Cancer
Mötley Crüe - If I Die Tomorrow
Moxy Fruvous - King of Spain
Moxy Fruvous - Big Fish
MC Lars - iGeneration
Darius Rucker - Drinkin' and Dialin'
Tenacious D - Tribute
Tenacious D - Wonderboy
Carly Smithson - The Show Must Go On (Queen cover)
Jay-Z featuring Eminem - Renegade
Brad Paisley - Online
Darius Rucker - All I Want
Katy Perry - Hot N Cold
We Are The Fallen - Bury Me Alive
Coheed and Cambria - The Suffering
Coheed and Cambria - Wake Up
Backstreet Boys - Incomplete

Club Nintendo Game and Watch Collection Review

2009-08-25T13:54:00.002-04:00

Club Nintendo is Nintendo's system to promote registration of video games. You get points for each game you register and additional points for filling out surveys related to each game. For collecting 800 points, you can get a copy of a Game & Watch Collection for the Nintendo DS. Those who follow me on Twitter know that I recently did that.

For those of you who don't know, Game & Watch were a series of individually packaged games that Nintendo made in handheld format. Each game was its own unit. This included such classics as Mario Bros and Donkey Kong. This DS collection includes three of those classic games - Oil Panic, Donkey Kong, and Green House.

Yesterday, the game arrived. What followed was about an hour of me sitting while watching TV playing games much older than most of my siblings. The gameplay has withstood the test of time - very simple gamplay for each game composed of using the directional pad and, at most, the A button. It is this simple gameplay that makes it so magical. It provides all manner of fun with just a few buttons.

Now, many people are familiar with Donkey Kong. I personally have played Donkey Kong many a time on many a console. But, before getting this collection I had never played Oil Panic or Green House. Let me tell you a little about each game.

Oil Panic is comprised of a main character on the top screen trying to collect dripping oil which falls at a set time period from random locations. Once his container is filled - he then dumps it out to a person below who must be directly below him to catch it. If you let the oil spill above - a small fire starts and you lose one chance. If you spill oil below, it falls on your gas station customers. The controls are simple to learn, but difficult to master. It is frantic fun trying to collect the oil and drop it so that your gas station patrons are kept content filling their vehicles.

Green House is a game where you protect your flowers from bugs. You have a can of bug spray and need to kill the bugs as they approach your flowers. If your flowers get attacked three times, the game is over and you have lost. It seems simple, but jumping between screens on the DS to catch insects before they take out your flowers can become fastly challenging.

All in all, for the price of free because I had registered my games - this was well worth the price. I would suggest registering products with Club Nintendo - because you never know what promotion they will come up with next.

Video Game Idea

2009-06-28T14:31:00.003-04:00

Welcome to my 100th post on Newman's Narratives. For my 100th post - I'm going to post a video game idea that I've had for years...but just now figured out how to make it work.

The game would be entitled Mario and Sonic. It would be an adventure platformer akin to Super Mario Galaxy in gameplay with some intermixed high speed levels. The plot is as follows -

An FMV opens with Mario and Luigi walking with Princess Peach in the Mushroom Kingdom. The Kingdom is at peace and the people are having a celebration akin to the beginning of Super Mario Galaxy. An envoy from the neighboring Robo-Kingdom has come offering a peace treaty to the Princess. The envoy is Metal Sonic and he hands the Princess a letter which, when opened, causes smoke to fill the room. Metal Sonic grabs the Princess and flees the scene at high speed while the Mario Brothers cough and wheeze in the smoke filled room.

Sonic and Tails are racing in the Green Hill Zone. The two are just zipping along frantically with Amy following the two of them yelling, "Wait up, Sonic." That's when Sonic trips over what appears to be a small, brown mushroom. The Mushroom then stands up, it's a Goomba. The Goomba whistles and a small army of Goomba's surround Sonic. He goes on the attack (similar to the intro to Sonic Unleashed), taking out a number of Goombas. All the while, a Hammer Brother sneaks from behind and grabs Amy.

We then pan to room with a large, round metallic table. Two shadowy figures enter the room and shake hands - it's then revealed to be Dr. Eggman and Bowser. Eggman then says, "This plan is foolproof and when completed, we will easily capture our respective worlds." The two then laugh as they fade to the intro screen.

The idea for the game would be that Bowser would be going after Sonic and Eggman after the Mario Brothers. Gameplay would go back and forth between Mario and Sonic levels. Starting with Mario (or Luigi allowing the player to pick from the start and freely switch), the levels would be akin to Super Mario 64 or Super Mario Galaxy levels. Sonic levels will be like Mario levels, but faster. Sonic levels will have more straightaways. Halfway through the game - the two meet up and, simultaneously, Eggman betrays Bowser - implanting him with a robotic chip which makes Bowser his drone. The remainder of the game involves Mario, Luigi, Tails, and Sonic fighting Eggman's minions, Bowser's minions (controlled by Eggman), and eventually the two of them. It would make sense to allow the player to switch freely between the four characters - and it would be awesome to allow Co-Op mode where one player is Mario and the other Luigi - or, when the point is reached - allowing one player to be Sonic and the other Mario or Luigi or Tails.

I think there's a lot that can be done in a crossover game, that could be much more exciting than the two sets of characters meeting at the Olympics. Don't get me wrong - I love Mario and Sonic at the Olympic games, but I think that a richer gaming experience could be created with a teamup game. Thoughts area always welcome.

The Templar: Buffyverse Story Idea

2009-06-12T14:04:00.003-04:00

After watching a LOT of Angel lately (finished Season 4 and starting Season 5), I had come up with my own idea of a completely separate Buffyverse character / show idea. The show / story set would be entitled "The Templar." Here's an explanation of the world setting.

The main character is Sir James, the Templar knight assigned to protect the Christian community in / around Washington, DC. The Templar knights have survived their official dissolution by the Roman Catholic Church and have been operating autonomously for centuries. They currently have one primary Templar in every major city around the world, each named for a book of the Bible. Sir Thomas Genesis is the Cheif Templar, based on Jerusalem.

The stories would involve Sir James protecting Washington, DC from supernatural as well as human threats. The stories would lead James to a few realizations - the fact that anyone can be a Christian, no matter what they look like; that non-Christians are important at keeping the world safe; and that working as a team helps.

The first few stories I had ideas for were as follows -

James comes to DC as the official Templar relieving the retiring Sir Jonah II. An Representative (from a made-up district) who publicly claims to be a Christian, has recently been appointed House Minority Leader through an internal coup of Republican leadership. Representative Patterson has been a leading voice for conservatism - and at night has been sacrificing babies to Moloch in order to gain power. James and Jonah in his last mission uncover this demonic underbelly of Congressional pages and Congressmen to prevent Representative Patterson from continuing his hypocritical and evil crusade.
James is contacted by a small congregation in a DC suburb. Pastor Neiman is a Parasite demon (like Merl from Angel), and much of the congregation are demons / supernatural beings. An anti-demon brigade has been picking off congregants indiscriminantly - ignoring the fact that they were peace loving Christian creatures. James realizes that even non-humans can be Christian and good. Pastor Neiman's son, Marvin, asks to train with him as a potential Templar apprentice - James takes him on.
James is contacted by a Rabbi in DC who needs help. A man claiming himself to be a Christian missionary had been coming around his Synagogue, congregants have been disappearing since then. This leads James to find this underground group that who uses a warped version of Christianity to justify the murder of non-Christians. James for the first time sees how someone with ill intent can warp and manipulate the words of his faith for evil.

Suggestions for ideas / thoughts on this idea are welcome.

What If 2000

2009-04-26T16:42:00.004-04:00

I've been toying in my head with two alternatives to what historically occurred and have a few ideas as to what might have happened. The first one is as follows:

What If Gore Won in 2000?
It's an idea that many have come up with and has been tackled to varying degrees of bias. Remaining as unbiased as possible - this is what I came up with.
Gore's term in office is marked by the war in Afghanistan following the terrorist attacks on September 11th. The economy struggles, but with less of a budget shortfall than under President Bush, it manages to steady itself almost entirely by 2003. 2002 sees major Democratic gains and the capture of both houses of Congress. During his first term in office, Gore signs into law the Sarbanes-Oxley Act, the McCain–Feingold Act, and the No Child Left Behind Act. No Child Left Behind is fully funded. He supports the Kyoto Accord and pushes for some far reaching anti-global warming legislation towards the end of his first term in office. Taxes are increased on top earners in the United States in 2003. In 2003, Afghanistan has its first democratic election under its new Constitution.

In mid-2004, President Gore pulls out of Afghanistan. Gore/Lieberman win against the ticket of John McCain/Lamar Alexander. A high profile speech that some consider the best from the Republican convention, was given by recently elected Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal. After the 2004 election cycle, Maryland Lieutenant Governor Michael Steele becomes the Republican Party chairman. His tenure begins with a number of public missteps and gaffes, but by the end of 2005 his face seems to disappear from the news.

Federal taxes rise a bit during Gore's second term as he continues to push his anti-global warming agenda in Congress. 2005 sees North Korea and Iraq testing rockets over neighboring airspace. The United Nations condemns their actions. Iran, Iraq, and North Korea each claim that they are working on nuclear programs. Gore calls for multi-party talks with China, South Korea, North Korea, and the United States to halt North Korea's nuclear program. He calls for talks with Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan, Kuwait, Saudi Arabia, and the United States to help halt the Iranian and Iraqi nuclear programs. Progress is very slow and does not happen in the Middle East as Iran and Iraq refuse to participate in talks. Economic downturn begins in late 2005 and after years of Democratic party rule, 2006 sees large Republican gains. 2006 sees the Republicans recapturing the House of Representatives and the selection of new Speaker of the House Michael Pence.

In 2007, Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal forgoes a bid for reelection endorsing Republican State Senator Walter Boasso as his successor. Boasso defeated Democrat and Louisiana Public Service Commissioner Foster Campbell.

In the 2008 election, Vice President Joseph Lieberman decides not to seek the Presidency citing that serving as Vice President for eight years was all he needed. In the first open election in years, many jump into the fray. The Democratic primary was primarily between former US Senator John Edwards, US Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton, and former Vermont Governor Howard Dean. Clinton eventually won the primary in early May and selected Howard Dean as her running mate.

The Republican primary appeared to be more divided at first with former Governors Bobby Jindal and Mitt Romney facing off against former Senator Fred Thompson, and Congressman Ron Paul. Following a huge win in Iowa and South Carolina (Romney wins New Hampshire and ties Jindal in Michigan), Jindal has large momentum going into Florida. Thompson endorses Jindal after his South Carolina loss. Jindal edges out Romney in Florida and then wins huge on Super Tuesday. Romney drops out after Super Tuesday to support party unity and endorses Jindal. With Jindal as the nominee, he waits until Clinton selects Howard Dean as her running mate to pick former Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Colin Powell as his running mate. Jindal/Powell defeats Clinton/Dean in an extremely close election. Looking very similar to the 2004 election in the real timeline.

Modern Macbeth Adaptation

2009-01-17T10:53:00.002-05:00

I've come up with the idea for the skeleton of a modern adaptation of Macbeth. It chronicles the rise and fall of Vice President Jonathan Macbeth.

Characters and Macbeth Equivalent:
Vice President Jonathan Macbeth - Macbeth
Second Lady Hillary Macbeth - Lady Macbeth
President Thomas Duncan - King Duncan
Secretary of State Jennifer Baquette - Banquo
Secret Service Agent Arnold Duffy - Macduff
Speaker of the House Malcolm Duncan - Malcolm
Palm Reader Lady Hecate - Hecate/Three Witches

General Plot:Story begins in the middle of President Duncan's second term in office with Representative Malcolm Duncan sworn in as the youngest Speaker of the House in history following mid-term elections. Vice President Macbeth was a retired General who was a critical supporter of the President and important in helping define his foreign policy platform. Following giving a huge speech in Ohio, Macbeth passes a palm reader at the state fair. Lady Hecate invites him in and offers him a free reading. Lady Hecate tells Vice President Macbeth that he will become President one day and that the Secretary of State will beget Presidents. Lady Hecate tells the Vice President that no politician could stop his rise to power. This becomes all the Vice President can think about.

The Vice President returns to Washington and talks with his wife about the prediction. His wife suggests killing the President jokingly. It then becomes all encompassing, all that the Vice President can think about. Macbeth then takes a trip to meet the troops in Afghanistan and meets in secret with an Arabic gentleman who he'll pay big money if he kills the President. Macbeth gives him all the details of a trip him and the President will be having at his cabin in Montana. The assassin sneaks in and shoots the President, as he tries to escape - Macbeth shoots him with a legal firearm making it appear as though Macbeth was defending the President and himself from the would-be assassin. The primary agent responsible for the President was Agent Arnold Duffy. Duffy had been on vacation at the time of the assassination. Duffy immediately suspected the Vice President.

Macbeth then becomes President. The guilt weighs on him and his wife. Macbeth starts to become paranoid. He sends the Secretary of State to a mission in Gaza, knowing that he had information regarding an attack in the area. Secretary Baquette dies in the visit. President Macbeth is concerned about Duffy and has him removed from his post. Around the same time, Duffy finds the information that can incriminate the President. Macbeth goes on a speaking tour trying to build up a good image for himself. The First Lady, while the President is away, commits suicide. The President returns home and continues his descent into madness. He focuses inward and begins to ignore the public, hiding in the West Wing. His cabinet becomes concerned about the President's behavior. Duffy drops off a letter in the mailbox, sending all the incriminating evidence to the Attorney General. The President decides to go out for a speech when Duffy assassinates the President.

The story would end with the Speaker, the late President Duncan's son, being sworn in as the next President of the United States of America.

Thoughts welcome.

Sonic Chronicles Review

2009-01-16T22:14:00.004-05:00

For Christmas, my brother-in-law got me a copy of Sonic Chronicles for the Nintendo DS. As a ridiculous fan of Sonic the Hedgehog games, and owner of each Sonic collection for the Gamecube, the Sonic Adventure series, and a strong proponent of Sonic and the Secret Rings, this seemed like a good choice for me. It was.

Sonic Chronicles is an RPG created by BioWare. BioWare were the creators of such RPGs as Knights of the Old Republic, Baldur's Gate, Neverwinter Nights, and Mass Effect. Sonic Chronicles is a quasi-serious RPG about Sonic the Hedgehog taking plot elements and world setting elements from the Sonic Adventure series and Sonic Heroes. The game begins with Sonic in the Green Hill Zone with Tails getting in touch with him. Tails tells him that Knuckles has been kidnapped by some alien creatures who were going after the chaos emeralds and the master emerald. Sonic is then led on a quest to try to save Knuckles and figure out the agenda of these invaders.

The gameplay is entirely done using the stylus. Pointing and dragging the stylus around moves Sonic around the level. Combat sequences are fun, if not the most challenging. Super moves are interesting in that you follow a pattern sequence to complete them in Elite Beat Agent-esque format. It adds a level of challenge to make sure you can pull off the interesting attack maneuvers. The learning curve felt large when I first tried the game, but turned out to be much easier than anticipated.

The story is actually interesting and characters are developed better than one would expect from a video game based on a character such as Sonic the Hedgehog. Shadow is the most developed I've seen him in any game he's been in, and I've played Shadow the Hedgehog. Big the Cat is a lumox, but enjoyable. Amy and Cream are even amusing. Eggman's introduction into the game is also wonderfully crafted as far as I've seen thus far, I'm currently halfway through the game. The dialogue is cleverly written. One fun option is that Sonic is occasionally given options beyond the standard in conversation - being allowed to make snarky comments and those he's mocking act accordingly leading to some fun interactions.

All in all, if you like simple RPGs and Sonic the Hedgehog, try the game. It's a lot of fun and I'm looking for someone else to trade Chao with.

Huron Carol

2008-12-24T15:22:00.000-05:00

I've been listening a great deal to the Crash Test Dummies Christmas album, Jingle all the way..., and it's great. A Christmas carol I had never heard of ends the album, it's entitled The Huron Carol. The music is beautiful and the vocals of Ellen Reid with backup by lead singer Brad Roberts makes for an amazing melody that I had never heard before. The Huron Carol is a traditional Canadian Christmas hymn according to Wikipedia it was "...written in 1643 by Jean de Brébeuf, a Jesuit missionary at Sainte-Marie among the Hurons in Canada." He wrote the lyrics to a traditional French song in the native tongue of the Huron/Wendat people he was living with. Also, instead of using traditional Christian terminology to discuss the nativity, Brébeuf used imagery and words which would make sense to the people he was preaching. In the early 1900s, the lyrics were translated into English in 1926 by Jesse Edgar Middleton. The lyrics weren't so much translated as they were altered to use early 1900s imagery to discuss the nativity. The Crash Test Dummies used the 1926 lyrics, which is traditionally sung in Canada.

One of the striking aspects of the song, besides the imagery of Jesus wrapped in rabbits skin and pelts brought by the wise men, is the use of the traditional Algonquian name for God, Gitchi Manitou. If you are interested in a new Christmas carol that most Americans have never heard before, check out The Huron Carol. It's filled with an interesting history and a beautiful tune.

Garfield Minus Garfield

2008-11-19T10:30:00.002-05:00

In one of the greatest advances in comic strip history, a man decided to create a comic...that took Garfield comics and removed Garfield, the character. What remains is an esoteric look at single life from the perspective of lonely and mildly depressed John Arbuckle. It also makes you realize that Garfield was always thinking his responses to John Arbuckle...so John was always talking to himself anyway...

Measured Out with Coffee Spoons

2008-10-24T22:41:00.002-04:00

Lately, I've been listening to a lot of Crash Test Dummies...well, just the album God Shuffled His Feet, and I've got to say...it's great.

The music is very well composed and no one sings quite like Brad Roberts. The songs are interesting and altogether creative. I find myself thinking about the oddities of the music as I sing along. If you, like me, remember the album from the early nineties and like many, only remember Mmmm Mmmm Mmmm Mmmm...pick the album up again and give it another listen. From Afternoons and Coffee Spoons to the thought provoking The Psychic to the sexual confusion of Swimming in You Ocean. Try it out the album again, it's worth another listen...

Katy Perry's Ridiculous

2008-08-16T15:00:00.003-04:00

Katy Perry doesn't want to be one of the boys, despite her current album title. The album I was able to pick up for $3.20. People will say a lot of things about this album. They will call it ridiculous, they will call it modestly homophobic, they will call it crazy pop. They will be right...ish.

The entire album feels like a crude satire on modern teen culture, making fun of slang, attitudes, actions, partying, etc. The songs range from the pop sensation "I Kissed a Girl" to the reflective "One of the Boys," which almost serves as a tomboy anthem. The album hits all aspects of pop music with Perry writing or co-writing every single song. It's one part Alanis Morissette, one part Avril Lavigne, one part Britney Spears (pre-"Britney's Back, Bitch"), three parts extreme satire.

Many of the songs can be taken as offensive, but I'm of the mindset that the album is satirizing all that's wrong with this next generation of teenagers. Perhaps Katy Perry isn't as clever as I give her and her production staff credit for. Perhaps she's just a little crude and just as bad as all those fools who use "Gay" to mean stupid/lame instead of it's true definition...happy or homosexual. If you want to enjoy some great pop music, check out some of the less than well known songs on the album like "Hot N Cold" or "Fingerprints." Will she ever get a second album? Who knows, but I do know that this album is fun...if not amazing. If Kelly Clarkson went ridiculous in her lyrics on My December, I could imagine it fitting in alongside this album...

Darius Rucker Does Country?

2008-07-03T13:46:00.002-04:00

Hootie and the Blowfish frontman Darius Rucker had tried to go solo before...as an R&B artist, which flopped. Well, apparently he's trying again...this time with country music. The verdict? Listen for yourself on his MySpace page. I heard the song on country radio and said to my wife, "Have you heard this before, it's pretty good. I wonder who sings it." Then came the credits...Darius Rucker.

I can't wait to hear what else comes from this guy.

5 Funniest Buffy Episodes

2008-07-02T20:09:00.000-04:00

Comedy Central points out the top 5 funniest Buffy the Vampire Slayer episodes. All great episodes, especially The Zeppo. Check it out.

Best. Movie. Poster. Ever

2008-06-30T20:20:00.001-04:00

And yes, it’s real -- Rob Zombie’s one a ridiculous man.

Dr. Horrible Teaser Trailer

2008-06-26T12:46:00.000-04:00

Here’s a link to the teaser for Dr. Horrible’s Sing-a-Long Blog, the greatest mini-musical endeavor…hopefully. I’m already excited.

Puzzle Farter

2008-06-21T09:13:00.001-04:00

Click the link. Try playing the game. Then answer me this...how is a game with a fish headed critter than flies around with his farts be this much fun?

HT to Rob

Ripeville

2008-06-12T19:35:00.002-04:00

Ripeville has returned to the internets. Fun comic strip with anthropomorphic fruits and vegetables. Worth checking out.

Buffy Reunion

2008-06-10T19:58:00.002-04:00

Here's an article from IGN where a panel of former Buffy castmembers, writers, etc. all met together in an awesome way. Yes, this included Joss Whedon, Sarah Michelle Prinze, James Marsters, and even good old Seth Green. It seemed like it would have been an awesome panel to see...I wish I did.

How Jack & Bobby Could've Been Awesome

2008-06-09T21:52:00.004-04:00

Jack & Bobby was a show a few months before the 2004 Presidential election. What was the premise? The lives of two boys named Jack and Bobby, the symbolism is not lost on the audience, are chronicled at present time and as a documentary of the life of a President McCallister. At the end of the first episode, you find out which McCallister boy was the President.

Now, the general concept was awesome. A show that went back and forth between the modern life of this future President and a documentary with interviews with those close to the President or who knew the President including Cabinet members, political opponents, and members of the media. It had promise, but instead it relied on terribly weak plot elements which turned it into something else entirely. This show could have been one of the best on television, ever. Instead...it failed and was canceled rather quickly. Here's how it could have been better.

First, never do a subplot involving the mother of the future President hooking up with one of her students. Ever. That plot was terrible, added nothing to the story, and added nothing to the characters. Have the mother continue to deal with her marijuana addiction in front of her children with no discussion of her job except that it begins to suffer because of it. She could have been a deep and intense character as part of the Jack and Bobby's lives without ever going much deeper into her job. Her job was unimportant, her relationship with her sons was. That needed to be developed more fully.

Next, do an entire string of episodes with from the opposite stance...start with the President dealing with a crisis and him looking back to specific moments from his childhood in brief flashbacks. Never lose the fact that this show is supposed to be about a man who will become President and how his current life molds him into the man he would become. Show the man he would become. Show how this Independent President changed America.

Also, they needed a set timeline to be established. This isn't a show that could go on indefinitely. It needed to be defined by clear cut events in Jack and Bobby's respective lives. Frankly, I think it should have been broken into a set of five seasons, each of them focusing in on a different portion of the President's life. Start as a child with the formative years around 2004. Jump to the end of high school. Jump to college. Jump to the beginning of his political career. And so on. Also, show the plot and the lives of the characters evolve over time. Each season can't end on a cliffhanger, either. It needs to be wrapped up in a bow in case the show ends then, giving the audience satisfaction that we know that much more about the future President's life.

My idea -- get Brian K. Vaughn, who writes the amazing Ex Machina, on staff and revamp this show from scratch. He's great at writing political dramas and could remold this show into something awesome.

That's it. I think with these tweaks and maybe some new writing, this show would have been amazing. Will my dream of seeing the history of future President Robert McCallister actually come true? I doubt it, but it'd be amazing to see happen.

Music I'm Looking For

2008-05-31T22:14:00.002-04:00

If you decide you want to pick me up a CD or two for my birthday at the end of June...here's a few that I'm looking to find --

The Avalances -- Since I Left You
Jim Steinman -- Bad for Good
Deltron 3030 -- Deltron 3030
Beck -- One Foot in the Grave
Crush 40 -- Crush 40
Nick Lachey -- What's Left of Me

I'm sure there aren't that many looking for this information...really, it's mostly so I have a public record of the music I'm looking for to make sure I'm actually able to find it. But, here it is nonetheless.

Interesting Ozian Quandary

2008-05-28T10:24:00.000-04:00

According to “The Marvelous Land of Oz,” the Princess and ruler of Oz, Princess Ozma, was transformed the a little boy named Tip as a baby by an evil witch Mombi at the direction of the Wizard of Oz. Mombi hid Tip for a while until Tip eventually escaped the witch’s rule and found out who he/she truly was…a girl, named Ozma.

This poses a serious question for Ozma. When the time comes and her Royal Highness wants to get married, how exactly does she tell her future husband, “Oh, by the way, I used to be a dude…”

Story Elements

2008-05-27T18:53:00.004-04:00

I’m going to pretend for a moment that I’m Stan Lee around the time Marvel was just starting out. What did Lee do back in those days? He came up with an idea, a general premise for a story, and handed it to an artiest who put a preliminary product together and then Lee inserted the dialogue. So, I’m going to do the first part of that – collect some random story elements and post them. Here are a few –

Parallel to our world, a world of magic exists. A secret, international body called the “Council of Wizardry” has been helping to hide the world of magic from the non-magical world for centuries. Merlin, in 1990, had taken up an apprentice in secret by the name of Jonathan Modus. Why Modus? Modus has the highest magical potential that the world had ever seen. Merlin passes of natural causes in 1996. After a year or so, fending for himself and avoiding being conscripted by the Council, Modus changes magical history forever…by coming public with his magical powers.
America elected Ross Perot in 1992. Vice President Stockdale passes away in 1995 from the strains of the position, putting the sick war hero to bed earlier than he anticipated. Perot enters into 1996 after four years of relative peace and economic prosperity as the lead in all the polls. His Reform Party is being built nationally thanks to Pat Choate. And then…Perot is assassinated. Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich is thrust into the Presidency in March of 1996, throwing off the entire GOP primary and shaking up the entire world. This follows the story of three men, Newt Gingrich, Pat Choate, and Caleb Tollin. Newt, from the perspective of a man who just became Speaker of the House and is now dealing suddenly with the Presidency and an internal battle with his party to figure out what to do with the election. Pat Choate, who saw the vision of Ross Perot work from coast to coast and saw an emergence of a new party, now scrambling to organize his own national campaign for the Presidency as the party chairman and one of the few national figures in the party besides New York State Governor Tom Golisano (who barely won the Governor’s mansion of New York in 1994 with a stronger national Reform Party). And Caleb Tollin is an average voter in Virginia whose life is shaken by the assassination of the President and what happens to the economy and his life as this all happens to him in the background. It also chronicles how he votes in the end.
Create a musical that combines in a logical fashion the storyline and music of both Wicked and The Wizard of Oz (the 1939 musical movie edition). Some ideas include…the changing of Boq back to his novel persona and creating a new/picking a different Munchkin boy to be transformed into the Tin Woodsman; or show Fieyro and Elphaba reuniting in the Emerald City where the Scarecrow was reportedly made to replace the Wizard (according to the books) OR…perhaps have another Scarecrow in Fieyro’s place that Elphaba raises to follow Dorothy.
Confederate Zion story. For the background of this “alternate history” world setting, check here. The idea? Tell the story of the end of secession of New England from the perspective of a Confederate Ambassador to the US or UN and a Boston citizen who’s all in favor…perhaps a newspaper writer from the time period.
A Modern Templar story. The Templar leader dies of natural causes at the age of 75. Sir Caleb is asked by the new leader of the Templar Knights, Sir Ishmael, to go on a secret mission into Saudi Arabia to protect a small, Christian church from some bombing attempts. He arrives to find the church emptied with no one there. Caleb is then attacked from all sides by people who fight like Templar Knights. He fends the five attackers off and finds in the basement of the Church a shrine to Moloch. What Caleb uncovers is that Sir Ishmael is not what he seems; he had been using the power of the ancient deity Moloch to rise up in the Templar order and had sent those loyal to the late Sir Peter to their deaths. Caleb then seeks out proof to stop Ishmael from warping the Templar organization and perhaps to find a way to destroy the demonic source of Ishmael’s power.

So, anyone want to draw/write up any of my story ideas? Anyone find them interesting in the least…

More on Bones Season 3 Finale

2008-05-21T19:59:00.003-04:00

So, I've been sitting and thinking again about the Bones Season finale, and I've had some more ideas on Zack and his joining of Gormagon. I know it may seem a little far fetched and maybe I'm thinking too far into it...but Zack doesn't make mistakes and had to know that they'd look at his results to try to figure out how to help him. So, the question is...did Zack get tricked by Gormagon because he has a weak personality and sometimes logic is able to be used to manipulate him...realized the flaw in his logic quickly and purposely became sloppy so that he'd be caught.

Notice that the moment they told him they figured it out, he was pretty quick to tell them exact details about Gormagon and where he's living. Yes, they had to "logic" it out of him...but perhaps he was just playing dumb and playing the "insanity" card already so that he could give them the information, go to a mental institution, and perhaps atone for his ridiculous sin. Maybe I'm thinking too much into this...

Bones Season 3 Finale: Comments

2008-05-20T16:42:00.002-04:00

I’m warning all those who watch Bones, this rant contains tons of spoilers for the season finale. That said, the season finale marked the end of an era for Bones and filled me with a bit of disappointment, not in the episode…but in a particular character and his betrayal.

The episode began with me and my wife yelling at the screen. It was Booth’s funeral, and the reactions from the team made it seem as though Booth had died. They all seemed to be actually mourning his death and it bothered me to no end. Booth was one of the two main characters. He was a practicing Roman Catholic who added soul to the dynamic duo of the series. He was personable and distant simultaneously and provided so much to the show’s dynamic that without him…the show would become rapidly boring. Then, during a salute to the departed, we see that one of the soldiers present was Booth. A sigh of relief came to us both. The interactions between the characters as they realized that Booth was alive were awesome and made for some great story. What followed was intense…and saddening to a fan of the show.

Gormagon showed up on the scene suddenly, dropping off the jawbone of a man. Throughout the rest of the episode, it’s cast that Dr. Sweets or Hodgins could be Gormagon’s apprentice and the case is made indirectly and directly by different characters and comments made by the two characters. Hints here and hints there, with an explosion and permanent injury of Zack…it became clear that Gormagon was among them and manipulating them all. That’s when the realization hits you; at the same time it hits Booth and Bones…its Zack. You think back throughout the entire episode and all the pieces fit together…Zack was a murderer and an accomplice to Gormagon. It shatters this circle and shatters the team to me. It makes logical sense and of all the people in the team, Zack could be manipulated through the use of logical arguments alone. His mind works in such an extremely logical fashion that if one can use logic arguments, they can convince him to do anything. That’s why Gormagon was able to draw him in. It makes sense…but it destroys the current dynamic of the team. Zack wasn’t the glue that held them all together…he was just another cog in the well oiled machine that was the “Squint Squad.” But, he meant so much to the team and after his character had become so well developed that viewers like me really liked Zack. We saw him evolve from a reserved young grad student, into a confident Doctor who had an amazing singing voice and was still socially awkward.

It’s disappointing to see him go, but I’m looking forward to seeing how the cast reacts to his departure, the search for his replacement, and how the replacement interacts with the cast. Part of me expected this Gormagon story to last longer…to extend beyond this season into the next in an interesting way with more hints being dropped that Zack or whomever was the Gormagon apprentice. But, it is what it is. The outcome may not have been what I wanted to see happen…but it was an excellent twist ending that instead of defying logic making you go, “WTF!” it followed the exact logical scheme that the show has used throughout and made the plot that much more interesting and engaging. Well played, writers of Bones…I look forward to the next season that will hopefully not have a strike in the middle of it to mess up the number of episodes. Want to see or learn more, catch up on Bones at Fox's website. You can stream a bunch of episodes off the web.

The Emerald Reich: Part II

2008-05-15T19:35:00.004-04:00

I previously posted the first three sections of my Emerald Reich story, a darker toned Sonic the Hedgehog fan fiction. Here are sections 4 through 6 of this comic book that would have been...had I been capable of drawing. If you wish to know the backstory, go to the previous link before reading the following section. It's poorly written, I warn you...but I find it interesting.

Part 4: Worlds Collide
(Robotnick is seen from behind. He is shown from the back and is surrounded by 9 computer monitors showing all different rooms, filled with robots. One showing a large skeleton-like robot being built, the rest are fairly generic).
Robotnick: Let me see, (Show his face as he says) Computer, connect me to myself.
(The middle most screen blinks off from whatever image it was and goes to that of Robotnick. He appears to be surrounded by all manner of machinery, and connected to it through a few tubes his head. For ease of reading, he shall be referred to in this section as Myself.).
Robotnick: (Zoom in on Robotnick’s face) How are the last humans and their (a pause, he looks down shaking his head) leader doing?
Myself: (Seen as the screen before Robotnick with no emotion in his face) They are gone.
Robotnick: (Show Robotnick’s face and arms open outward about as he smiles) Defeated and crushed, we are as efficient as ever.
Myself: (Zoom in on the screen itself, can see some of the tubing’s connected in more detail, the grotesque machinery behind him clenching onto some human that appears to be flailing about) No, not defeated, gone.
Robotnick: What?
Myself: They have left this world entirely. They have entered your realm.
Robotnick: (Zoom in on his face, he looks bewildered) He tessered! (Back to a rear view of Robotnick’s head with the screen before it). I shall find him here and destroy the remaining humans. Enjoy your world, myself.
Myself: I shall (he smiles and then the transmission ends).
(Robotnick’s chair spins around and he presses a button on the armrests of the chair).
Robotnick: Snively, come here. Apparently we have a new pest in our realm… (he presses the button again and zoom in on his face which is contorted into an evil smirk) And we need to create something to remedy this. (A zoom in on the middle screen with the surrounding ones still partially in view, you see the robotic skeleton standing and a fur being brought over to it). HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH!

Part 5: Cain
(You see Cain sitting in a chair behind a desk. Desk is very nicely kempt with a few papers in a neat pile, a letter opener, and a stapler. In front of the desk is a chair, its back is to the viewer. A light orange Echidna in a suit can be seen standing behind the chair)
Cain: I don’t understand how a majority of people support HIM.
(Pan around to the side, you can see both Cain and this other Echidna standing across from him. It’s a male Echidna named Leba. He has no facial hair, and has a lighter fur tone. He wears a white suit with a black undershirt and a white tie. His braids are pulled back with a band of sorts holding them together).
Leba: Yes, I can understand where you’re coming from.
Cain: I don’t dislike him as an Echidna, I dislike him as our leader, as a guardian.
Leba: (Still standing, zoom in on Leba, he has his hands out) I know, you’ve said this a hundred times before.
Cain: (Angrily slams his fist into the desk) He allowed the Master Emerald to be stolen and SHATTERED in the human realm.
Leba: (Zoom in on Leba, arms crossed as though thinking) Yes, he did. (Show Leba with his hands on the desk looking straight at Cain) But wasn’t he the one who entered into the human realm risking his hide so that he could return every single piece to Angel Island.
Cain: (Cain fidgets in his seat) True, but if he was a better guardian he would not have lost it in the first place.
Leba: (nodding as he speaks) Perhaps, but we’ll never know now.
(Zoom in on the door) KNOCK KNOCK
Cain: (Cain stands and walks Leba to the door while saying) I’m sorry Senator Leba, but I have another meeting right now.
Leba: (As they reach the door) Good bye, Cain. Oh, and Mother says she hasn’t seen you in ages…
Cain: (Pushing Leba out the door) Good bye (grumbles) my brother.
(Another Echidna enters the room, dressed in a white t-shirt and jeans. He’s a black Echidna with a scar over his left eye. It seems to have blended in over the years)
Black_Echidna: You wanted to see me sir?
Cain: Yes, Claudius. I have…business to discuss. (Door slams on viewers)

Part 6: From the Grave
(See an image of Sonic shocked in the throne room of Acorn)
Sonic: You?
(Show in a black robe, with the hood pulled back, Shadow the Hedgehog)
Shadow: Yes, it’s me.
(Sonic walks over, puts out his arm and the grabs Shadow, hugging him)
Sonic: It’s good to see you, my friend…it’s been too long.
Shadow: Yes it has, Sonic.
(Sonic pulls away and looks confused for a moment)
Sonic: Wait a second, how did you…didn’t you?
Shadow: (Shadow shakes his head) It matters not how I returned, all that matters is that I have…and I’m here to help (latter line with his hand on Sonic’s shoulder)
Sonic: King Acorn, do you mind if I speak to Shadow, alone?
Acorn: (Can be seen behind the two) By all means (He walks out)
Sonic: How did you get to this world?
Shadow: I came here. (Shadow says somberly)
Sonic: Ok…How is Earth? (Sonic looks questioning, but optimistic)
Shadow: Currently under the reign of Robotnick.
Sonic: What?!? But he’s here.
Shadow: Then he’s about to attempt to control both worlds, we can not allow that. I fled that world with the remaining humans. (Show the humans being led through a portal with Shadow’s head at the top, text alongside saying) I led them here, hoping we would find refuge. (Back to Shadow’s face, he appears almost sad) There are a good 200 humans here. They are the only ones I could find. We are the Secret Service and we plan to eventually take out Robotnick.
Sonic: How? (Zoom in on Sonic) If he was able to take over their world, how could we possibly defeat him here?
Shadow: I have no idea. (He sighs and hangs his head down)

Fraggle Rock: The Movie

2008-05-14T19:33:00.003-04:00

The Weinsteins have the rights to make a Fraggle Rock movie. Apparently the director of "Hoodwinked" is being connected as a probable director. With this and the new Muppet Movie in the works...Muppet fans seem to be in for a treat in the next few years. Ahh, the memories...

Jason Segel Does the Muppets?

2008-05-08T20:09:00.002-04:00

Jason Segel, now famous for his roles in How I Met Your Mother and as the lead/writer of the hit film Forgetting Sarah Marshall...will now be working alongside director Nick Stoller to make a new Muppet movie. And news of it came out quite a while ago. How the heck did I miss this?

I'm already ridiculously excited.

Kelly Clarkson and the Pope MP3

2008-05-03T21:05:00.001-04:00

HT to poster Helen who pointed me to NixMix...which has a downloadable mp3 of my American Idol, Kelly Clarkson, singing Ave Maria to the Pope. Thank you and enjoy.

If an official version comes along...I am so getting it.

Testament

2008-05-02T14:31:00.003-04:00

For those of you who read comics/graphic novels, it's time you pick up one of the most interesting books you'll read. It's entitled Testament. Written by Douglas Rushkoff, Testament offers an interesting look into the world of the Old Testament. I'm borrowing all of it piecemeal from a friend of mine, and it's been some of the greatest comic-reading experiences I've had. First, let me tell you a very little about Douglas Rushkoff. He's one of the founders of Open Source Judaism and is an extensive writer on non-fiction topics like faith and the entirely fictional.

Now, let's return to a discussion on Testament. Testament, as I mentioned previously, explores the Old Testament/Torah. Instead of merely addressing its stories and writing them in comic book forms, it shows the stories as taking place in a time-space continuum that is ever changing and always occurring. All things at all times are, to a certain degree, simultaneously occurring to God/the gods in the case of the story. In this case, these all things refer to the Biblical stories of Abram, Jacob, Adam and Eve, Joseph, etc and to a semi-futuristic tale about a new global currency and a group of hackers and misfit college students trying to change it all and fight this new system. The stories are compelling and Rushkoff's interpretation of these Biblical stories is incredibly interesting and insightful. Let's do this through a for instance...

Rushkoff interprets the story of the binding of Isaac differently than I've ever seen. Instead of a test from God asking Abraham to kill Isaac...it's more of a test of his old faith. Prior to Abraham following the traditional Judeo-Christian God, he lived his life as many in his land had before him...following the ways of the old gods, which included child sacrifices in such horrific means as perscribed by Moloch. Abraham had Isaac and was going to, in the classical traditions, follow the old gods' ways of child sacrifices so that their retribution may be held at bay. Instead, his God stepped in and stopped the ritual saying that this was not the way. Human sacrifices were to no longer be performed and an animal sacrifice would suffice. Abraham was internally torn between the old ways he understood and which worked for him and the new ways of his new God who had proven to be true thus far, despite him falling short. It's an interesting view and one which would be consistent with the writing of this section.

This also points out the acceptance that there may be other gods in the way the Old Testament stories are written. But as Adonai is the God of the Gods, the God above all others, and commanded His people to worship Him above anything else...so long as they do, it matters very little how many other gods exist.

This well written story/collection of stories spans much of the Old Testament and provides some amazingly well thought insight into The Bible and the nature of God. I'd suggest it for the religious and non-religious alike because even if you don't believe...it's so well written and so exciting that it's hard to put down.

Kelly Clarkson and the Pope

2008-05-01T15:03:00.002-04:00

The woman who still is my American Idol, Kelly Clarkson, sang an awesome combination of the Olde English and Latin versions of Ave Maria for The Pope during his visit to the US. Here's the video -- the sound quality of the video is very weak and if you a) know one that's better or b) know if Clarkson plans to record this tell me immediately.

The Common Thread

2008-04-29T21:25:00.000-04:00

What’s the common thread amongst these three songs – Meat Loaf’s "I'd Do Anything for Love (but I Won't Do That)," Bonnie Tyler’s “Total Eclipse of the Heart,” and Celine Dion’s “It's All Coming Back to Me Now?”

Jim Steinman. The prolific writer/producer wrote and produced each one of these tracks, specifically tailored for the artists. Steinman is the creative mind behind the first two Bat out of Hell albums (he wrote half the songs on Bat out of Hell III…but had nothing to do with putting that album together) and produced/wrote a great deal of Bonnie Tyler’s vast career. His music is that larger than life, almost Operatic style of rock that is both moving and outlandish at the same time.

Jersey Girl

2008-04-27T19:06:00.003-04:00

I don't care what anyone says -- I still love the movie Jersey Girl. It's a great, touching movie about a man and his daughter...and the interactions between people. Really, Ben Affleck isn't a bad actor...

3 Wii Games

2008-04-22T15:39:00.005-04:00

If I knew a person who was just getting a Wii, I'd have to go out of my way and tell them to get the following games. Stat.

Sonic and the Secret Rings - I gave a brief review of the game before, read that first. Basically, here's the deal with SSR -- it's fun, fast paced platforming action that gives you a great tutorial section to learn the ropes of the game AND has the equivalent to Mario Party with Sonic characters for a great multi-player mode. Not only that, the party mode is really easy to pick up and has proven to provide hours upon hours of fun for my 4 and 5 year old siblings...in addition to myself, my wife, and my 23 year old sister from time to time.
Wii Play - I get it, it's not the greatest game in the world, but hear me out. First, you get a new controller. Second, you get a fun, albeit too brief, shooting gallery game. Next, it's got a great 9-ball (billiards) game. Add on an awesome little tank game and it's already worth the 10 dollars more than buying a new controller alone. I haven't played it in a while, but I don't feel like I wasted any money on this game. Worth the price.
Super Paper Mario - Of all the games I list, not Super Mario Galaxy (which is amazing and perhaps one of the greatest games of all time) and not Super Smash Bros Brawl (which is incredibly fun, especially with groups), why did I pick Super Paper Mario? Super Paper Mario has some stuff that most other games don't -- an engrossing plot, amazing gameplay, replay value, and a ton of interesting stuff to explore. It's got exciting characters, humorous adventures, and great gameplay! It's shift from 2D to 3D and the different character powers/Pixls...including a few hidden ones, make the game awesome. I still go back to this game constantly trying to see if I can best the two Pits of 100 Trials. Why else did I include this game? It's cheaper than SMG or SMBB and is equally as much fun.

So, for the most bang for your buck -- these are the first three games I'd suggest picking up for any new Wii owner. Each one well worth the price of admission. If you want some more quick picks -- here're two that are bargain priced --

Link's Crossbow Training -- Fun, cheap, shooting game with better than you'd expect gameplay.
Balloon Pop -- Fun, puzzle game.

Riddle me This

2008-04-22T15:36:00.002-04:00

Why is "Because I Got High" a stoner anthem? If you listen to the lyrics, it feels as though it's an anti-stoner song. The man goes from having a family...to being a paraplegic living on the streets because he got high. I never understood that.

Maybe I don't get it because I'm not high, because I'm not high, because I'm not hiiiiiiiigh.

Amazing Fortune Cookie

2008-04-13T08:51:00.002-04:00

I got the following fortune cookie from Chinese food on Friday --

A nice cake is waiting for you.

I've been on the lookout ever since.

Dr. Horrible

2008-04-09T16:56:00.004-04:00

What do you get when you mix music, Joss Whedon, Neil Patrick Harris, and Nathan Fillion? Give up? I did too. Apparently you get Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog. It hasn't started yet, but purportedly it's going to be a three part musical. Each part will be about 10 minutes long.

I think I'm ridiculously excited.

Sonic Chronicles

2008-04-04T17:40:00.002-04:00

I heard a while ago about a new DS RPG involving Sonic the Hedgehog. Now, I know the name...it's called Sonic Chronicles: The Dark Brotherhood. I want it, the moment it comes out. An RPG from Bioware about my favorite video game character on a handheld console I love...oh yes, I want it.

American Idol Covers

2008-03-30T16:57:00.003-04:00

I haven't watched a full season of American Idol since season 1 and my true American Idol, Kelly Clarkson, won. I watched one episode of this season and I must say...the non-native Americans in the competition are great. In addition, there were some amazing covers this past week -- including Carly Smithson's cover of "Total Eclipse of the Heart" and David Cook's cover of "Billie Jean," the Chris Cornell version.

If you use iTunes...use it now to spend the $1.98 and get these two tracks. Now.

Brief Sonic & the Secret Rings Review

2008-03-19T17:07:00.002-04:00

A lot of people have downplayed Sonic and the Secret Rings, and with it recently being $10.99 at Costco and on sale constantly elsewhere for $19.99, I want to point out that if you have a Wii and have any mild liking of Sonic the Hedgehog, you should get this game. Here’s a great review from The Tanooki for the game.

I’d also like to note that the party game mode is more in depth than I ever expected it to be – rivaling some of the older Mario Party games. I’ve seen my 4 and 5 year old sisters play this mode for hours at a time…and my 13 and 14 year old sister and brother (respectively) entranced by this mode for a few hours without even thinking of trying another game. It’s fun and the fact that the main game unlocks all manner of multiplayer stuff (including bonus characters and extra mini-games) makes it even more fun. Once more, if you own a Wii…and even mildly like Sonic, get this game now – it’s worth the rapidly lowering price of admission.

Random Smash Bros Brawl Post

2008-03-17T19:21:00.003-04:00

Well, I love the new Smash Brothers game. Brawl is amazing and more than worth full retail price. It’s fun and easy to pick up with the four different control schemes…three of which I love and the fourth (just the Wii-mote) my sister has picked up and destroyed all manner of people with so don’t knock it. Here’s a random list of opinions on the game, based on a thread from Cheap Ass Gamer --

Favorite new character/Why?
Pit. He can fly, he's from an awesomely underappreciated game, and has a new, revamped feel while still being balanced when compared to the classic Smash Bros characters. Sonic’s a close second mostly because…I love Sonic the Hedgehog in an excessive sort of way.

Least favorite new character/Why?
Lucario. I never liked the way Mew-Two played in Melee and Lucario is no different. Lucas is a close second since, like Lucario, he plays like an old character (Ness) who’s control scheme I never liked.

Favorite new stage/Why?
WarioWare. It adds a whole new element of awesome to the gameplay. Plus, it emphasizes the new Wario from the WarioWare series as opposed to "Oooh, I'm evil looking Mario" Wario. The WarioWare games, to me, finally gave Wario a new identity as a character that I really enjoyed. This was a welcome addition for me. The Mario Kart stage was a close second, just because it's so much fun.

Least favorite new stage/Why?
Rumble Falls. An entire level where fighting is almost thrown out the window with how fast you just have to keep jumping up and up and up.

Favorite Final Smash?
Link. For pure looks -- when he pulls it off, it looks amazing and destroys your opponent.

Least favorite final smash?
Donkey Kong. The bongos? Come on.

Fav Assist Trophy?
Little Mac. Because I wish he was a playable character and this is as close as it gets. Little Mac made the most sense to revamp and bring into the game as a playable character – he’s a boxer! But, this is still a lot of fun to see him running around punching out my enemies.

Least favorite Assist Trophy?
Mr. Resetti. He's just as irritating as he is in Animal Crossing and it doesn't add enough to the game to seem worth it, to me.

The Tanooki

2008-03-08T17:29:00.001-05:00

Here's a link to The Tanooki. I'm adding it to the very small list of links I have here. It's filled with awesome Nintendo specific news and randomness. Check it out.

Modern League of Extraordinary Gentleman

2008-03-07T17:00:00.000-05:00

A friend of mine and I were discussing something he had initially come up with -- a modern League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. First, I'm linking his very detailed and very awesome modern League post. For those who don't know, the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen is a group of classical literary characters that Alan Moore weaved together as a super team. But, in the meantime, I'll come up with my own idea for a League.

Mayor Mitchell Hundred (from Ex Machina) – Organizer of the group and current Mayor of New York City. He’s a political realist and a former superhero who’s leadership skills are…well, questionable at times. Imagine what Bloomberg’d be like if he were better looking, a former super hero, not independently wealthy, incredibly ballsy, and well…nothing like Bloomberg, I guess. Hundred adds some intrigue, great plot ideas, a base of operations, and an incredibly amusing personality that would mesh interestingly with the others. Imagine if this super team is a secret society based in NYC to protect the world from certain crazy dangers.
Willow Rosenberg (from Buffy the Vampire Slayer) -- Willow is such an interesting character by the end of the series. She's a powerful female witch who has to balance her power after a very explosive addiction to magic that led her to madness. Willow's inner turmoil would add a great deal to the story, and her vast knowledge of the supernatural and technology make her a very strong addition to the group.
Shadow (from American Gods) -- Shadow is, more or less, a brawny character who has a soft spot that most don't notice. Besides the fact that Shadow is, to a certain degree, a god...that provides him with a bit of power. Add on his firsthand experience with the "American gods," the reserved character would add a bit to the plot of a new League. Shadow's mostly a wanderer, he could have found his way into New York on his own. That's where our organizer, Mayor Hundred, would find him.
Rubeus Hagrid (from the Harry Potter series) -- I feel that no modern version of the League would be complete without a character from the Harry Potter series. I chose Hagrid so that I can ignore the magic system entirely and because his character is incredibly knowledgeable with beasts, huge, and easily able to provide comic relief if necessary. The character's got a great personality and if anyone can eventually force Shadow out of his shell, it'd be Hagrid.
Ash Williams (from the Evil Dead series) -- After returning to the world following the events of the Army of Darkness, Ash thought he was getting a promotion in S-Mart. Instead, S-Mart was sold off to the Wal*Mart Corporation. Watching the TV on that same day, he notices a new exhibit at the Museum of Natural History in New York City...that includes the Necronomicon somehow. Not knowing how this happened, Ash goes to the City to warn the Mayor of the dangers and the possible threat of the Deadites.
Casey Jones (from TMNT) - Picture this -- the Turtles are drawn into an alternate dimension akin to feudal Japan in TMNT 3...imagine if they never returned. Being that kind of guy, Jones takes matters into his own hands and begins combing the streets of New York for crime. As a former superhero, Hundred could relate. He finds Jones one night and stops him in his tracks saying, "How'd you like a paycheck for your troubles?" Jones officially became a minor member in Hundred's staff.

I had so many ideas for this -- at one point I was thinking about an entirely non-magical, no super powers team. Here's some random ideas that I ended up not including

Xander Harris (Buffy)
Bruce Wayne (Batman)
Hank Morgan (A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court) - Somehow wakes up to find himself in a bed in modern New York City.
Ralph Nader - We all know he's not a real person
Longinus - According to legend, the man who pierced the side of Christ. Also according to legend, he can't be killed unless he finds the Spear of Destiny. He's tormented internally as he knows there's a God, but doesn't quite care for Him as God killed his family and forced him to live forever unable to be happy.

Weird Alternate History World Setting

2008-03-05T20:37:00.001-05:00

So here's 2 points of divergence and where I went from there

Joseph Smith, III takes over the Mormon church after the death of his father, the followers of Bringham Young are removed from the church thereby removing the practices of polygamy, the Endowment ritual would be different, and Baptism for the dead would not be practiced.

The Civil War is won by the Confederate States of America after they allow slaves to fight in the war and received freedom for their efforts.

What does this change? All manner of things. First -- the Confederacy wins the first war of the America and quite possibly in the process takes back West Virginia as part of Virginia and Maryland, which would have peacefully joined had they been allowed. Second, the Mormons out west may still be armed, but they're not quite as alienated as they were for their beliefs because they don't have the polygamy or baptism of the dead. The Book of Mormon was enough through most of the early history of the church, but these new views put them at odds with a lot more people...especially the government of the US. Instead, they were able to spread their word much more readily. Thirdly? A new Native American nation would have been established in area of the modern state of Oklahoma, independent of both the CSA and USA, but protected by the CSA as one of its allies. This would make for an interesting buffer zone and new nation of Indian peoples in the Americas. What could happen following this historically? Well -- here's my ideas of big events.

1882 -- Mexican land grab where the CSA purchases a plot of land from Mexico leading to border conflicts with the US that escalates into full scale war. Large Mormon community in Utah secedes from the union leading to a two fronted war. The Confederates and Mormons win -- the United People of New Zion is founded as the Mormon nation and the Confederates take parts of Arizona and New Mexico, collecting them into the states of Jefferson and Arizona (different borders) by 1892. All blacks who join the Army are granted freedom upon finishing their terms of services again leading to over 50% of the black people in the CSA being free persons. The idea for a war over this is similar to the ideas from historian/alternative history writer Harry Turtledove's "How Few Remain" world setting. Amazing novel, by the way.
1884 -- Non-black slaves granted the vote in the CSA.
1892 -- Indians males granted the vote in New Zion.
1895 -- Virginia and Maryland officially ban slavery within their borders.
1900 -- New England secession movement begins to grow. Slavery banned in CSA by Constitutional Amendment.
1901 -- Indian Territory joins the CSA as the state of Cherokee (modern Oklahoma) -- Indian men granted the right to vote simultaneously, considering 80% of the people living in Indian Territory were Indians.
World War I breaks out with the US, Germany, Austria-Hungary on one side and Neo Zion, CSA, UK, France on the other. Russia is neutral after pulling out like in real life. Allied powers win and CSA does a little land grab taking Kansas.
New England secedes after WWI -- war almost breaks out, but UK and CSA intervene with troops to keep the peace.
Israel founded prior to World War II, dominantly Jewish state with a large Mormon temple in Jerusalem.
Socialism rises in Germany, Hitler rises in Austria instead of Germany.
Soviet Germany, UK, CSA, New Zion, China, Soviet Union, France against Austria, Italy, and Japan in WWII. United States remains neutral. New England sides with Allied forces, begins to build standaing army by the end of the war and enters in around D-Day.
Women granted the vote in CSA and New Zion after WWII.

After that, I'm not sure. Anyone who would want to help me flesh out the history of such a world, by all means. I'm going to call this universe "Confederate Zion" in case I come up with future posts on the topic of this world-setting.

Here's who the current North American leaders are --

President of New England -
President of the United States - Joseph R. Biden, Jr. (Whig)
President of the Confederate States of America - Angus King (Democrat)
President of New Zion - Merrill J. Bateman

The major political parties --

New England

Progressive Party - Exactly as it sounds, akin to the Progressive party of LaFollette, it supports a larger role of the unified federal government.
Unity Party - The Unity Party is a big tent party that encompasses conservative populists, conservatives, and libertarians.
Unionist Party - A minor party that has been opposed to secession from the beginning. They have called for reunification with the US and hold a majority of the state legislature in the state of Vermont. They do not hold a single seat in the New England Congress.

United States

Democratic Party -- Akin to the modern Republican Party, the Democratic party remained the house of the more conservative thinkers. The party of Jefferson, Jackson, and Goldwater. Remains a dominant force in modern politics.
Whig Party -- After the collapse of the Republican Party in 1864, the Whig Party surged in the 1868 election with former Republicans and Unionists with unity candidate and President Henry Wilson. They've been the competing party since. Slightly more progressive than the Democratic party.

CSA

Democratic Party -- The state's rights party followed exactly the same path as the US Democratic Party listed above.
Confederate Party -- The party that supports a more unified confederation, direct election of Senators, and has the most moderate members who support more federal measures.

Gary Gygax (1938-2008)

2008-03-04T17:24:00.002-05:00

One of the co-creators of Dungeons and Dragons, Gary Gygax, passed away today. Your creation has spawned movies, games, and the dreams of all manner of people. Thank you, Gary Gygax.

EDIT: Both Penny Arcade and Dueling Analogs have tribute comics to Gygax.

Jackson on Jeopardy

2008-02-28T19:44:00.002-05:00

You've got to feel awesome when you become a Jeopardy category, as Samuel L. Jackson was today. Awesome.

Matchbox 20 Concert

2008-02-21T23:37:00.001-05:00

Went to the Matchbox 20 concert in Albany today and the big thing I have to say...the first opening act, Mutemath, was awesome. Worth checking out...now.

Zelda Legos!

2008-02-20T21:49:00.002-05:00

Ocarina of Time Lego Style. Watch it and be amused.

Chaos Diamonds 3

2008-02-17T14:29:00.002-05:00

I forgot how much I enjoyed reading Chaos Diamonds 3, a detailed fan comic involving Sonic the Hedgehog characters in a very different way than you've seen them before. If you enjoy some ridiculous webcomics, Sonic the Hedgehog, and enjoyable, action packed storytelling then check it out. Worth a read...despite starting off slow. It picks up...quickly.

Three Wooden Crosses

2008-02-16T22:45:00.002-05:00

By Randy Travis...

A farmer and a teacher, a hooker and a preacher,
Riding on a midnight bus bound for Mexico.
One's headed for vacation, one for higher education,
And two of them were searching for lost souls.
That driver never ever saw the stop sign.
An' eighteen wheelers can't stop on a dime.

There are three wooden crosses on the right side of the highway,
Why there's not four of them, Heaven only knows.
I guess it's not what you take when you leave this world behind you,
It's what you leave behind you when you go.

That farmer left a harvest, a home and eighty acres,
The faith and love for growing things in his young son's heart.
An' that teacher left her wisdom in the minds of lots of children:
Did her best to give 'em all a better start.
And that preacher whispered: "Can't you see the Promised Land?"
As he laid his blood-stained bible in that hooker's hand.

There are three wooden crosses on the right side of the highway,
Why there's not four of them, Heaven only knows.
I guess it's not what you take when you leave this world behind you,
It's what you leave behind you when you go.

That's the story that our preacher told last Sunday.
As he held that blood-stained bible up,
For all of us to see.
He said: "Bless the farmer, and the teacher, and the preacher;
"Who gave this Bible to my mamma,
"Who read it to me."

There are three wooden crosses on the right side of the highway,
Why there's not four of them, now I guess we know.
It's not what you take when you leave this world behind you,
It's what you leave behind you when you go.

Dinner Guest Realization

2008-01-17T11:14:00.000-05:00

I just had another startiling realization. I must be a terrible dinner guest, as my favorite conversation items are politics and religion...oh, how taboo.

Thoughts on Being Vain

2008-01-11T16:51:00.000-05:00

I just realized something about the song "You're So Vain." Considering that the singer directly states to the listener that they are so vain...wouldn't that imply that the song really is about them? Perhaps they're not that vain after all...

Bomberman

2008-01-10T21:49:00.002-05:00

I just picked up Bomberman for the DS. If you haven't played some iteration of Bomberman, I suggest doing so immediately. It's a simple game and the fun extras for the Bomberman for the DS are worth the price of admission. I know this is a pretty weak review...but I started writing this about a month ago and just decided to finish it up...kind of.

12 Days of Christmas Question

2008-01-04T15:01:00.000-05:00

Why did the singer of the song receive so many birds from their true love? Is there something I'm missing about the coolness of a flock of birds hanging out at your house for Christmas?

Why People Still Care about Duke Nukem

2007-12-24T11:28:00.000-05:00

With Duke Nukem Forever being on hold…almost indefinitely and the new teaser that came out, God knows how many of them they’ve made, people are still excited about Duke Nukem. Why is that? Let me tell you.

Duke Nukem is the traditional badass character. He’s witty…kind of, stealing most of his witticisms from Bruce Campbell in Army of Darkness, but that’s wherein a lot of the humor rises. Throughout Duke Nukem 3D, (DN3D), the first FPS installment of the series, Duke will randomly just spit out phrases from Army of Darkness or the creator’s own mind – which were all off-the-wall ridiculous in their humor. Tack that onto him running through the mid-nineties after pig-like space aliens invaded, and it makes it even more amusing.

That’s part one. Part two was the fact that DN3D was modded like crazy. As Tycho points out, you could run onto the internet and download a ton of mods or new levels with the click of the mouse and gain hours upon hours new gameplay. This just added to the replay value of this game which was already high enough as it had more than one level of difficulty, like most of the old-school FPS games. It added to the fun and allowed you an opportunity to, much more readily than most modern games, to modify and change the way you played. The sheer number of modified DN3D levels out there was amazing and added to the game in so many different ways.

Next, which is a very sad reason, is strippers. Throughout the game, and really for gratuity’s sake alone, there were half-naked strippers strewn about the levels. They were also…damageable, you could blow them up with enough ammo being popped into them. Also, as Duke got close to them he threw cash at them. It added to the ridiculousness of this game and also appealed to the lowest common denominator in many male gamers. It was stupid, but altogether comical how the strippers were just added to the game. They almost felt like they were added last minute to make the game not rated as more mature than it really was, hence the almost random layout of some of the strippers (ex. dancing on rooftops, or on space ships).

Then there’s always this – the anticipation. They’ve been working on this game for nearly a decade. It’s changed engines, consoles, etc multiple times since. It’s changed staff. It’s changed…well, everything at least a half dozen times. And because of this – it builds and builds the anticipation for this game, making people more and more interested in what will happen when it’s actually completed. If it’s either awesome or awful, it’ll still make people happy – only the mediocre will turn people away…because they expect either the worst game ever after all this time…or something so ridiculously fantastic that it appeals to every single person who games.

Finally, and perhaps most importantly, people like DN3D…because it was stupidly mindless shooting. The plot was weak at best, at worst it was atrocious. Yet, the game was fun because you just ran around and shot at everything that moved. There were no people specifically to save, except for the strippers…which you weren’t penalized for shooting. It was simple running around and killing monsters. That didn’t mean it was a simple game, it’s merely to point out that there didn’t need to be much to it. It was fun, plain and simple. Whether it appeals to everyone or not – it’s just a fun game where you run around and kill monsters with no need to worry about consequences, plot, or anything else for that matter.

DN3D was not the best game in the world, by far, but it was liked and really, that’s all that mattered. Other thoughts on the Duke Nukem phenomenon are more than welcomed…they’re encouraged.

A Modern Hymn Post

2007-12-22T07:27:00.000-05:00

I began thinking about the early Methodists and their attempts to use music to help convert people to Christianity. It was a smart maneuver, especially considering they used tunes people already knew and added a Christian message into the lyrics so others could sing along. It produced some amazing results, not the least of which is my favorite Christmas hymn, Hark! the Herald Angels Sing, which I spoke about at length last year. The second verse really sums up the entire Christian spirit in its lyrics and makes me proud to be one.

I got to thinking, this morning, what if modern Christians did something akin to this. What if they took modern tunes and changed the lyrics to have Christian overtones. So, to ruin everyone's favorite tunes...I started doing that. Here are some examples --
To the tune of "Baby One More Time..."

Oh I must confess
That my sinfulness
Is killing me now
But you know I will believe
That with my Lord here
He gave us His life
To take away all of man's strife

My Jesus Christ is saving me
His sacrifice has set us free
Through Him salvation is guaranteed
He gave us His life
To take away all of man's strife

To the tune of "Girlfriend"

Hey, hey, you, you
I really like your Savior
Yea man, I feel
That I need to convert
Hey, hey, you, you
I want to be a Christian

I can't pretend
Because I know
Salvation is precious
And yeah
He's the ever loving Prince of Peace
I can tell you He loves us
Again and again
(And again, and again)

Old gods, cast them whereever
Through Christ I can do much better
I need His everlasting love
And that is what I'm praying for

I know, they're ridiculous -- but maybe that's the thing. Our music stylings have changed so much that much of our popular modern music is not quite as timeless as it was in the past. Much of it sounds dated and won't transcend into the next few decades very well. Yet, when I hear Hark! The Herald Angels Sing every Christmas, I am still moved and still love the music. I wonder if that will happen some hundred years from now -- where our music is still loved and cherished. If not, we need to begin truly working on more timelessness in our tunes because without that bit of timelessness, our music will disappear and that incredibly important piece of us will just slip away...

Firefly

2007-12-16T20:30:00.000-05:00

If you haven't seen Joss Whedon's short-lived series Firefly, I suggest you talk to me or rent it...now. As I've mentioned before, I like most everything from Joss Whedon. But, Firefly is perhaps the best of his works and quite possible the greatest television series of all time.

The series is set in the future -- a future where a civil war had broken out between those planets which wanted to form an alliance of sorts and force everyone to join their alliance -- and those which wanted independence from this alliance. Effectively, the galaxy that they live in is similar in atmosphere to the old west -- a great many people are wandering from town to town looking for work however they can get it. Instead of traveling by horse, buggy, or on foot -- people are traveling in space crafts. Technology, instead of being ridiculously futuristic it's gotten to aircrafts that can travel from planet to planet, there's no laser weapons, no crazy aliens, no sound in space, and no "warp speed" or anything of the sort. Instead of going to that extreme that most science fiction does...which makes it more realistic and gritty.

The main characters vary from a goofy pilot, to a former "independent" Colonel, to a Doctor running from the law with his sister, to a Companion (i.e. prostitute) who's considered to be the most honest working one amongst them. Great depth to each and every one of them -- more dimensions that most characters on shows that have been running for years.

The bottom line on Firefly? It's a space western along the lines of Cowboy Bebop -- except without the animation, life on Mars, and ridiculousness. It can appeal to everyone. I should know -- my wife who hates science fiction, for the most part, can sit down and watch the series with me...and enjoys that along with the movie, Serenity. It's fun, cleverly written, and just a masterpiece of television. And yet, like too many shows these days, wasn't even given a chance. With a poor time slot and the episodes shown ridiculously out of order, Firefly never had a shot. The one season of the show is worth every single cent to purchase and again, if you haven't seen it...watch it.

Alex Trebek Heart Attack

2007-12-11T22:37:00.000-05:00

Keep Alex Trebek in your thoughts -- not merely because he's a great television game show host, but because the man recently had a heart attack. Let's hope he gets better quickly and back on the television. You'll be in our thoughts, Mr. Trebek.

Quote of the Day

2007-12-04T22:04:00.000-05:00

Here's a lovely quote from the ever modest, Quentin Tarantino --

“I watch my movies all the time. It’s the only stuff out there worth watching…And the music in my movies is always the best, too. I’ve always just felt that the combining of the right piece of music with the right scene, the right sequence, that creates movie moments that you remember for the rest of your life and you even appropriate the song. If you do it really right, then you can never hear that song again without thinking about that scene in the movie. “
-Quentin Tarantino

Puzzle Quest

2007-12-03T22:05:00.001-05:00

Welcome young lads and lasses to a world unlike our own. Where the dead walk the earth and attempt to attack our kingdom! You are of noble blood and must help defend the kingdom from these undead attacks and help to find out the source of these attacks. Welcome to the world of Puzzle Quest.

Puzzle Quest's story is ridiculously simple -- but its not the story that's the most fun, it's the fact that it's a puzzle game with some RPG elements that make it incredibly fun. In many ways, this is a modified version of Bejeweled. Instead of merely playing by yourself -- on the same board, you are taking turns against an opponent. The Wikipedia article explains the gameplay a little better -- but imagine competitive Bejeweled with you gaining power as you continue to play the game allowing for interesting "attacks" which can change up the course of gameplay. It's a lot of fun and worth checking out...especially for the Nintendo DS, where the controls shine. Using the stylus to click and point to where you want to move the blocks is beyond natural. This is a wonderful game and I'd suggest it to puzzle and RPG fans...as well as fans of good video games.

Dollhouse

2007-12-03T19:08:00.000-05:00

Joss Whedon is teaming up with Eliza Dushku to create the new television show...Dollhouse. It's a new sci-fi show that sounds a bit like Dark Angel, but...seeing how Joss Whedon is writing it, it'll probably be better. Dushku will be producing the program along with Whedon.

After the writers strike, I hope to see what comes of this show.

Chuck Norris and Sonic...

2007-11-23T14:50:00.000-05:00

This is an awesome little comic strip. Hearing Robotnik discuss the Chuckster is priceless.

Interesting John Waters Interview

2007-11-19T16:21:00.000-05:00

Where he discusses scum-bag current Republican Senator Larry Craig. It's an interesting read.

Life Imitating Art, Art Imitating Life

2007-11-04T20:49:00.000-05:00

Imitation of Life is a 1959 remake of a 1934 film. It's one of my wife's favorite films, so we recently picked it up on DVD used. She didn't expect to find it on DVD anywhere, let alone hidden in FYE's new used DVD bin for less than $7. But, I digress...

The film is about two women and their daughters -- both of which are single mothers in the 1940s...one of which is white and the other is black. They end up coming together in this oft looked over feature. It begins with the white woman, played by Lana Turner, trying to break into acting...and has to hold onto her values to avoid being dragged into the gutter by the hucksters and cheats who wish to bring her down to near prostitute status. On the other side of the coin, the black woman played by the amazing Juanita Moore, basically raises the daughter of the white woman and her own incredibly light skinned daughter...who hates that she's black. She tries to pass as white all the rest of her life, barely being able to accept her true self.

The film touches on prejudices of the past and present. It discusses such ideas that aren't always touched today with such passion and such amazing acting. These women act so convincingly that two of them were nominated for two Academy Awards. If you are interested in a classic dramatic film with amazing acting, look into this film. Try to find this gem amongst the many films that came out of this era...and uncover the magic of a dramatic work about real women.

Kinky Boots

2007-10-30T21:32:00.000-04:00

Kinky Boots is a British film that my wife and I recently rented from those lovely "Red Box" locations for a cool two bucks...because we forgot to return it the first day.

The film is a comedy-drama about a classical shoe company that recently got taken over by a son who didn't quite know what he was doing...or want to know. He's thrust into running the company that had been dying for years. He looks for a niche market to try to bring in new revenue. What does he find? Women's boots for men who dress as women.

It's an amusing film that tackles some interesting and serious issues. It's also loosely based on a true story, which makes it evevn more interesting to me. My wife and I both enjoyed the movie and I would suggest it to anyone.

I Love Elite Beat Agents, But...

2007-09-25T12:09:00.001-04:00

I love the game Elite Beat Agents. It's a clever, silly, and fun beat game that can entertain a man for hours and shows that beat games can be played with a touch pad on the DS...and done very well.

But...Three Panel Soul pegged it best with this comic. Sometimes the story just makes a person a little confused by its ridiculousness.

Talking About the iGeneration

2007-09-25T07:39:00.001-04:00

A while back, iTunes ran this promotion where they gave away free songs when you joined their facebook group. It was great, and it was the only reason I joined. During one of the packages of free songs, I got a track entitled "iGeneration" by MC Lars. Check out the lyrics, specifically the second verse --

The iGeneration new organization meant optimization and unification,
When imagination gave participation in creation of culture a manifestation.
The Berlin Wall fell and out we came, the post-Cold War kids laid claim to AIM.
LOL, OMG, yo, BRB. Space, colon, dash, closed parenthesis.
We sat at our laptops and typed away, and found that we each had something to say.
Web-logged our fears, our hopes and dreams. Individuated by digital means.
Fiber optic lenses, DVD, Coca Cola, Disney and Mickey D's.
Flat mass culture, the norm that took hold; I hope I die before it gets old.

It may seem like a bunch of buzz words about the internet and modern mass media, but think about it for a moment and you'll realize that MC Lars, with is expression and his lyrics has put the nail on the head. He has found a new way to define Generation Y, and frankly I think they should be defined that way. We are the iGeneration.

The internet is such a defining factor in this entire generation, from MySpace to Facebook to Web logs of our lives, our hopes, our ideas. We use the internet as our means of uncovering the news far more than we use classic media. We post personal thoughts and sometimes information, yet no one seems to blink an eye. We don't care about privacy issues as much, so long as we continue to have a choice as to how much of our privacy we wish to give up. We are much more liberal on social issues partially because we see them, we see people and we feel their plight through the mass media and through their own personal release of emotions through the internet. We appear more passive in our attempts to protest and raise up against, but in reality we do so en masse to each other through the incredible power of the internet. We've found a way to protest and get our message across to one another across the globe in such a way that has never existed before. We find video games to be as true of a media as film, television, and literature. We also take our freedoms and liberties for granted far more than we should. We have a faith that's personal and many explore different religions and home brewed versions of traditional faiths. We are ready to take over already as Generation X stands by with a bit of rugged ingenuity and the iGeneration rises into political offices already. We are unified through this information superhighway and we like it that way. We are the iGeneration and I think I'm happy to be a part of it.

Something to Sing About

2007-09-19T23:12:00.001-04:00

In the musical episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Once More with Feeling," has some wonderful music that I've talked about at least once before here. One song that I didn't pay as much attention to at first was "Something to Sing About," which discusses Buffy's emotions about coming back from the dead. The profound aspect begins with the first verse and I think it can apply to...well, many people --

Life's a show
And we all play our parts
And when the music starts
We open up our hearts

It's all right
If some things come out wrong
We'll sing a happy song
And you can sing along

Where's there's life
There's hope, everyday's a gift
Wishes can come true
Whistle while you work
So hard all day
To be like other girls
To fit in in this glittering world

Don't give me songs
Don't give me songs
Give me something to sing about
I need something to sing about...

It's profound in many ways. The emotions evoked by these lyrics is amazing and what it means both in and out of context is great. Think about the desire to fit in, the desire to be understood by everyone around you, you want to be accepted by those who care. It's an interesting song and Sarah Michelle Gellar pulls it off far better than Jewel would have (as Whedon initially had intended, according to Wikipedia).

Everyone feels like they need something to sing about from time to time. They need something to make them more fulfilled in life -- something may seem missing. This whole introduction sets that stage. Joss Whedon has a way with words, so it's not surprising that he's able to come up with such clever and meaningful lyrics. Read them through and think about them.

A New Tron Chapter Awaits

2007-09-12T08:23:00.000-04:00

One of the first movies to make use computer generated graphics was Tron. It was a sight to behold and incredibly fun back in the 1982. This year marked its 25th aniversary.

Well, apparently, that marks as good a year as any to finally make a sequel movie. The original creators are still around and ready to help write for this one. This will be interesting to see how a sequel will be handled, and how much of the ridiculous "Tron 2.0" video game gets incorporated into it. I just hope that it can live up to the expectations that will be created from a 25 year wait between sequels...

Angel and the Joss Whedon Realization

2007-08-30T21:00:00.000-04:00

I've realized completely at this point why there are so many people who believe that Joss Whedon is a master storyteller. I began my Joss Whedon fascination a long time ago and I didn't even know it. He was one of the primary script writers for Toy Story -- as a big fan of that film, must say that it was incredibly well written with witty dialogue.

It was later on that my friend Yanni got me to watch all of Firefly before going into the theater to see Serenity, one of my favorite movies of all time. That led into me watching Buffy. I already knew I enjoyed the same group of storytellers and most especially, the fanciful ideas of Joss Whedon. I found Buffy Season 1 on sale for 15 bucks and picked it almost on a whim. I loved every episode and have watched over and again every episode since. I even got my 12 year old sister hooked on the show, asking to borrow seasons of Buffy and asking me rather detailed questions about the show on a regular basis.

Now after finding out that I got a $150 Best Buy gift card for my new cell phone and that seasons of Angel were on sale, I picked up the first two seasons on DVD. After watching the first eight episodes, I've realized that Whedon and company are masters at storytelling. To go from cowboys in space ala Firefly; to all the complications of high school written cleverly and with almost epic action; now I'm watching Angel which is a detective style drama with witty dialogue and very in depth characters. Frankly, I can't wait for Ripper.

Whedon and his team of writers have masterfully crafted nearly every single genre and he's only ready for more. I know I'll be here waiting as excited as ever to hear the new stories told by this storytelling team. I also realized how relatable the characters are -- despite their demonic or superhuman characteristics. There are many complaints that can be made about the writing and styles of Joss Whedon -- but above all, he's an amazing entertainer and a great storyteller.

Sad, But True

2007-08-30T16:41:00.001-04:00

Read over this comic about little Billy. Poor little Billy's puppy died...and guess how his mother handled it.

The Emerald Reich

2007-08-28T19:26:00.001-04:00

I began writing a fan-comic script entitled "The Emerald Reich" about a crazy alternate, darker Sonic the Hedgehog universe more akin to "Other-M" than most other Sonic comic books. It was set in the following scenario -- the Sonic Adventure games happened in the real world whereas Sonic, Robotnick, and company all came from an alternate reality that's a modified version of the Archie/SatAM version of "Mobius," a darker place with robotic monsters around every corner and a floating island nation full of echidnas.

The problem? I couldn't draw. So, here comes the first three sections of the script. I'll post more if anyone actually cares to read it.

Part 1: The Scheme
(Robotnick sits in a small, unadorned room. There is a metallic door and a large desk where he sits. In front of him lay the plans for some sort of robotic creature device).
Dr. Robotnick: (The doctor presses a button on the desk and says into the intercom)
Snively, come here
Snively: (He enters the room saying) Yes, master, what is it you need?
Robotnick: I have a plan, it will take time, but once it begins there shall be no man or beast that could stop me.
Snively: (Grinning) Perfect master, what does this plan entail?
(Dr. Robotnick presses a few buttons on the desk, a screen comes down from the ceiling. Zoom in on the screen which shows Kodos in a dark cell with one of the E-100 units moving past it in a corridor)
Robotnick: (Back to showing Robotnick) First, we will be needing the hide of (pointing at the screen and you can partially make out Kodos looking upwards) that. (Show Robotnick turn around in his chair and face Snively) I have a use for it. (Show Robotnick’s face with an evil grin) All else we’ll need are the usual robots and the Master Emerald to power my city, and I can wait for that (Robotnick laughs maniacally, standing. As he stands you can see the plans were for a robotic creature, an outline of which surrounds it, it’s shaped like a large feline creature).

Part 2: The Meeting
(You see a tapestry showing two Echidna’s standing with fists out in front of a large emerald, one is blinded and holding an olive leaf, the other is muted and holding a sword)
(Zoom in on Knuckles with a gavel in hand, with the tapestry behind him. He is dressed in a suit with a red tie, adorned with images of chaos emeralds here and there)
Knuckles: Order, Order I say!
(You pan around to see an entire room filled with echidna’s in similar dress sitting around a table. The echidnas seem to be in some sort of discussion, they calm down after his comment)
Knuckles: We were talking about the Chaotix and our part in their existence. The Chaotix is a unit that I had formed, a team of creatures of all nations whose sole purpose was to protect even when others could not. Protection is what this nation was founded on, protection of the emeralds, why is protection of the remainder of this world so different. If the emeralds are to get in the wrong hands, it would be devastating to all of us.
(An echidna stands; he is a dark orange in coloration and has a grey tie. He has a small, neatly trimmed mustache and has a small pin on his suit-coat, his name is Cain)
Cain: If I may speak, Mr. President.
Knuckles: By all means, Senator Cain.
Cain: Thank you. Our nation is, as you’ve said founded to protect the emeralds. Before we even dream of focusing on anything else, we should focus within. We should protect the emeralds first and foremost.
(A cheer of ‘Here here’ comes up from the crowd)
Knuckles: Ignoring the danger of Robotnick is pointless.
Cain: (Tensions are beginning to build) Robotnick has no need for us; he wants to destroy the nation of Acorn, not the floating island.
Knuckles: (A vein appears to become more prominent in his head) I have seen this man firsthand, he will come for us, and he will destroy many in the process and I do not want to stand by while that happens.
(Another echidna stands)
Echidna_2: Pardon, Mr. President, but is it even our place to step in, in these foreign affairs. Acorn’s war against Robotnick is his, not ours.
(The crowd of suited echidnas begin to rise up, arguing)
(Knuckles pounds his gavel)
Knuckles: Silence! (All are quieted and sit) We have a motion on the table. The motion reads, “We the members of the Angel Island House of Guardians do hereby move to sever all official ties with the fringe organization known as the Chaotix.” It has been written up by Senator Cain, is this motion seconded.
(A random echidna rises saying ‘Aye’)
Knuckles: All in favor. (Pan around, showing hands raised) All opposed. (The same type of pan). Abstention? Motion passes 23-14-3. I will send a message immediately to the Chaotix, telling them of our decision. (Knuckles shakes his head)

Part 3: The Freedom Force
(Sally and Sonic are seen walking through a large door. Behind them are Antoine and Tails. Zoom out so that you can see them in the grand throne room of King Acorn).
Sonic: (Narrating) King Acorn had summoned us in that day, a day I won’t forget.
(The four of them reach up to the front and King Acorn comes down from his thrown to greet them)
Acorn: Ahh, welcome. You all wonder why I have sent for you.
Sally: Yes, I do and what is this I heard about you dissolving the Freedom Fighters?
Acorn: Yes, all in due time my child, but first I must say that Sally will no longer be leading any Freedom Fighters. (Acorn is holding Sally by the shoulders) Since it is the 18th year since your birth, (He lets go) you must finish your training as Acorn Royalty first and foremost.
Sally: Father?
Acorn: There is no debating this. You have been a warrior since you were 13, it’s time you learned how to be a Princess.
Sally: (shook her head in anger and then stomped her foot as she said indignantly) But who will lead the Freedom Force, surely you are not dissolving the organization?
Acorn: (The King walked away from Sally and towards Tails) Of course not, Miles?
Tails: Yes, your Highness?
Acorn: (The King puts his hand on Tails’ shoulders) Miles, will you kneel before me. (Tails kneels and Acorn pulls out his sword, placing it on Tails’ right shoulder and moving it towards his left shoulder saying) I dub thee Sir Miles of Acorn and I ask you to rise. (Tails stands back up smiling) Sir Miles, I now grant you full control of our elite, the Freedom Force. I trust you Miles and wish you luck.
Tails: Thank you, your Highness. I shall not fail you. (Tails walks out of the throne room).
Sonic (Narrating) A lot of changes were made that day. (Show Antoine bowing before Acorn) Antoine was placed in charge of the Royal Army. (See Acorn’s arm on Sonic’s shoulders) And I was to direct the two forces and a third one, a Secret Service.
(Sonic looks confused)
Sonic: Secret Service? What do you mean?
Acorn: (Calls to the shadows with his hand) Come over (Looks back to Sonic) I am establishing a secret service, a reconnaissance based group for my kingdom.
(The robed figure is next to Acorn who is pointing, Vana White style)
Acorn: Sonic, I’d like you to meet the head of our secret service (The robed figure begins pulling back his hood and we pan to Sonic’s face which has a look of shock)
Sonic: You? You’re…alive?

Ripper Confirmed

2007-08-27T23:52:00.000-04:00

The Buffy spin-off they've been talking about for a long time, the Giles based BBC series "Ripper" has apparently been given the greenlight by the BBC, Tony Head, Joss Whedon, and the approval of Fox. According to Whedon, it looks like it'll be a 90 minute made-for-TV feature about Giles -- but no matter what the format, I know I'm overly excited. Those who know me know that I'm a big Buffy dork. Gifts of "The Long Way Home" graphic novel are always appreciated...

Blue Door

2007-08-11T08:37:00.000-04:00

My brother is in this band called Blue Door. If you like to rock, then check them out on MySpace. Do it, they're great and you can download each of their tracks to listen to at your own pace -- or on your iPod/MP3 player...

My Boys

2007-07-23T22:25:00.001-04:00

My Boys returns to television next Monday on TBS. I highly recommend the show -- as such, I'm linking to the TBS My Boys subpage, where you can watch the episodes from the first season. I know, I like strange television -- but this show is worth checking out. Enjoy.

0 mg

2007-07-23T11:05:00.001-04:00

Have you noticed that when you write out zero miligrams in the proper format -- it spells 0mg, i.e. OMG!

Coincidence...uhm...yea.

Top 10 Favorite Songs of All Time

2007-07-22T09:12:00.001-04:00

As I did with my favorite albums of all time, I'm going to have to go in no particular order. I honestly can not decide which one is better or worse, but I can narrow it down to 10 individual songs that I truly love.

Dexy's Midnight Runner – “Come On Eileen” – This is perhaps one of the campiest little ditties of all time. It's silly and I love every second of it. It's hard not to crack a smile when you hear this song, it just can get an entire room to just immediately start singing along as if out of nowhere – it's almost become a universal happy song for generation upon generation. It's great and there's really not much else to say about that.

Jerome Pradon – “Heaven on Their Minds” – The first number from a musical, written for Jesus Christ Superstar by Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber. Pradon's version was for the revival production of JCS by Gale Edwards beginning in 1997 and filmed for television in 2001. The music is wonderful and Pradon's voice is amazing. The reason for its inclusion in this top 10 is not merely the great music and great singing voice – but the passion inherent in the song itself – and in the vocalist. You almost can feel the true strife of the apostle Judas as he realizes that he's afraid of what could happen to his good friend, Jesus, if He continues down this religious path as opposed to the save the poor path he initially viewed His teachings as. It's the incredibly impassioned tale of a man who is worried about the health and life of his good friend – a friend who happens to be the Messiah of the Christian people. The emotion this can evoke in me is amazing and frankly, deserves a spot on the top 10.

Chris Cornell featuring Eleven – “Ave Maria” – This is the type of risks which I really want more artists to take. This is a traditional Christian hymn which has been sung in Latin for centuries. Cornell took that hymn, developed more modern music with the band Eleven, and used an Old English version of the lyrics making it both poetic and more accessible to the average listener to Cornell's work. His voice has such a range and power that you don't hear in most of Cornell's work, both solo and with Soundgarden or Audioslave. It really makes me want to hear him produce an entire solo album of hymns or power ballads – just those because, frankly, it would sound amazing.

Coheed and Cambria – “Wake Up (Acoustic)” – A strange addition to the mix here is the song “Wake Up.” Originally found on the unnecessarily long titled Good Apollo, I'm Burning Star IV, Volume 1: From Fear Through The Eyes Of Mad, this version was found on the Snakes on a Plane soundtrack. It doesn't steer too far from the original in tune, but in raw emotion evoked by the lyrics it surpasses the original by leaps and bounds. It's a sad song of love expressing how everything that the narrator was, was for this one person and yet, here he am, leaving and there's nothing that can be done because she's just letting him go.

Johnny Cash – “Hurt” – You know, there are a great many amazing Johnny Cash songs out there and yet, I always come back to this haunting cover of the Nine Inch Nails song of the same name. As Trent Renzor said when he heard this version, “This is the way this song was intended to sound.” The hurt in Cash's life from the loss of his wife is heard in every single note of this song. There's such passion in the old man's voice that comes out as he gets out each and every line that has the power to bring tears to a man's eye. It's an amazing track that shows that Johnny Cash never lost any of his talent as he aged, it merely matured and aged with him.

Jay-Z – “Lucifer”– The first hip-hop track on this list. This track is a collaboration between Jay-Z and Kanye West, which shows in the masterfully put together beats that are simultaneously catchy and timeless. The song begins with Jay-Z asking the Lord to forgive him, who's the him? His friend Bob Law, it appears. The entire song discusses the terrible situation that his friend has been in and ends as it begins, asking the Lord to forgive his friend who appears to have recently passed. He says that it was Lucifer, the Morningstar, who truly was the cause of the bulk of this sin that his friend and even he had committed. This song has powerful lyrics that you don't expect from such a source.

The Cast of Buffy the Vampire Slayer – “Walk Through the Fire” – Go ahead, laugh and laugh and laugh at the Buffy fan for adding this song to the list. Done laughing at me? Okay, now listen to the song and then decide whether or not you can laugh anymore. Inside the episode, this one song proves to me that Joss Whedon knows how to write music, whether he can admit it to himself or not. This song evokes so much emotion in the scene that can all be heard in the voices of the cast. It's a beautiful collaborative piece that really helps build the climax of the episode, revealing the feelings of each one of the characters through a power ballad. It's great fun and great music all at once – I can listen to this one track over and over and over again and never get sick of it.

Beck – “We Live Again” – I rarely have a clue what Beck is talking about in...well any of his songs. The entire Mutations album is no different – except for the sole fact that it's a beautiful compilation of off-beat music ranging from the huge harpsichord tune listed here to other, folksy songs. As a review from Allmusic.com described this album, “...his best songs are simultaneously timeless and modern.” This track is the perfect example of that.

Traditional – “Battle Hymn of the Republic” – I'm going to be honest, this is one of the first hymns I need to place on here and that I have no idea who I'd post as the artist whom I'd like to hear this from. Perhaps Chris Cornell, in a similar fashion to Ave Maria, who knows. This is just one of those hymns that make me proud to be a Christian and an American simultaneously. It's a wonderful marching tune that puts a smile on my face every time I hear it, either as “John Brown's Body” or as the “Battle Hymn of the Republic,” either way I'm happy to hear it.

Coheed and Cambria – “The Suffering” – Another track originally from Good Apollo, I'm Burning Star IV, Volume 1: From Fear Through The Eyes Of Mad, I find myself surprised that I'm placing this track on here as well. Yet, every time I hear this song I find another layer of it which I fall in love with; be it the amazing progressive chords to the masterful verses which span the genres of progressive rock, emo, and alternative rock. This multi-faceted song may very well be one of the best songs of all time, making me more and more excited to hear new music from Coheed and Cambria. Early music from the band was fun and all, but listening to their second and now third album, you can hear the band's music mature beautifully with this track and “Wake Up” being the culmination of their wonderful new sound that is both larger than life and down to earth at the same time.

Top 10 Songs Soon

2007-07-20T13:03:00.000-04:00

I just had an epiphany and the 10th song for my top 10 favorite songs of all time has come into my head. Realizing how often the song itself comes into my head and how much I love it made me realize its place there on the list. I'll need to write this one up and add it to the list which I've been working on for well over a month now. Expect hopefully before the weekend is over.

My December

2007-07-16T10:55:00.000-04:00

Be honest, what have you currently heard of the album "My December" by Kelly Clarkson? I'm sure you've heard of the battle with Clive Davis, about the firing of her producer, about the poor sales, about the fact that Clarkson wrote all the tracks (or co-wrote them with less than famous producers), and that it's the worst album of Clarkson's career.

Yea, I've heard it all -- and I'm here to tell you that the album is great and has a sort of passion that you rarely hear from an artist. Kelly Clarkson, in this album, helps prove her mettle as an artist and I'll explain to you why.

In addition to amazingly personal tracks with beautiful lyrics like "Sober" and "Haunted," the album contains "Since U Been Gone" style pop-ish ballads like "Never Again." That matters very little. Before I continue this discussion on an album that I really enjoy, let me say that this truly is Kelly Clarkson's first album. Why? First album's from artists are a bit raw, but are filled with passion that transcends musical boundaries making for, on average, a great album that draws in new fans. It usually does not sell as well as major label hits down the line, but it defines the artist as an actual musical talent and, in the case of Clarkson, as more than merely a created pop sensation but a musician with many different musical interests and talents. As an artist works on their second or third album, you see them grow as an artist and the lyrics become more in depth, the music becomes more complex -- but it is that first album which defines them as an artist. This is a defining album for Kelly Clarkson as it shows to the world a) that she can write music/lyrics and b) that she's not willing to remain quietly as a contrived pop sensation, but actually wants to take the reins and control her own musical destiny akin to artists like Christina Aguilera as opposed to Britney Spears or Jessica Simpson. In many ways, Clarkson needed this album to prevent herself from being pigeonholed as merely a voice with nothing to back it up. This helps prove otherwise.

For anyone who enjoys Kelly Clarkson's voice and some of the more personal tracks off her second album, this album is worth listening to. For those who merely appreciate music, you owe it to yourself to give this a chance. You may hate it, but at least try it out for yourself instead of merely accepting the hype at face value. This blogger almost did and it would have denied him some beautiful music.

Uncle Orson on Serenity

2007-06-13T12:30:00.000-04:00

I found this old review of the movie Serenity by Orson Scott Card, the author of Ender's Game. He's right...it is one of the greatest science fiction movies of all time. Perhaps he should ask Joss Whedon to direct the Ender's Game film...

Leave Out All the Rest

2007-05-23T14:14:00.000-04:00

Here are some lyrics from a new track from Linkin Park's album Minutes to Midnight --

I dreamed I was missing, you were so scared
But no one would listen, 'cause
no one else cared
After my dreaming, I woke with this fear
What am I
leaving when I'm done here?

So if you're asking me, I want you to know

When my time comes, forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave
behind some reasons to be missed
Don't resent me, and when you're feeling
empty
Keep me in your memory, leave out all the rest

Leave out all
the rest, don't be afraid
I've taken my beating, I've shared what I made
I'm strong on the surface, not all the way through
I've never been
perfect, but neither have you

So if you're asking me, I want you to know

When my time comes, forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave
behind some reasons to be missed
Don't resent me, and when you're feeling
empty
Keep me in your memory, leave out all the rest
Leave out all the
rest

Note I said some lyrics, it's not the entire song whose title is the title of this post. I find the lyrics deeper than anything I anticipated from Linkin Park, a sort of introspective piece that I never could have expected. The music is beautifully prepared and the lyrics have a haunting aspect to them. I know we all feel this way from time to time and it's interesting to hear someone actually put this fear of no one caring when you pass into music.

Mr. Pibb v. Dr. Pepper

2007-05-21T09:31:00.000-04:00

I've got to say it...Mr. Pibb is much better than Dr. Pepper. Not because of the taste of their respective product, but because Pibb didn't need to spend all that tim to get his doctorate in order to compete with the big boys.

Sonic 2 FMV Ending

2007-04-11T14:27:00.000-04:00

Going back through my primary blog, I came across one of the most sparse posts I've made. What was on it? The link to follow -- an FMV version of the ending of Sonic the Hedgehog 2. So, without further ado -- I present the link again, in all its amazing glory.

Sonic-holic Anonymous

2007-04-11T14:16:00.000-04:00

Hello, my name is Matty N and I'm a Sonic-holic. I admit that I still cling to the long dead gaming empire that was Sonic the Hedgehog. I still play my Sega Genesis, merely to attempt to defeat Sonic 3 & Knuckles with all the Chaos Emeralds. I bough all the Sonic Collections for the Cube and each of the revamped versions of the Sonic Adventure games. I admit that I purchased Sonic Heroes and still wear the free t-shirt I got for pre-ordering it as an undershirt, despite hating the game and gameplay. I admit that I played Shadow the Hedgehog, and enjoyed it. I admit that I purchased on the day it came out the Sonic the Hedgehog animated series, SatAM. I admit that I'm really excited about Sonic and the Secret Rings despite reviewers that I trust panning it.

I am Matty N and I am a Sonic-holic.

Fondest Video Game Memory

2007-04-10T15:05:00.000-04:00

I was recently asked on a forum what my favorite video game memory was...so, I thought about it. Of course, there's the creation of characters such as the Dad from Family Matters and some very homo-erotic wrestler who liked to slap his opponents with JB and Kirby in Wrestlemania 2000 for the N64.

But, I've got to say...the best one was merely hanging out with my younger brother, Alex; dividing up the fighters in Super Street Fighter II on the Genesis and having our own tournaments, our own "belts" to fight for, and our own elaborate WWE-esque story arcs involving the characters. It was ridiculous and fun...and it begs the question, who said video games can't breed creativity?

Crisis of Infinite Me's?

2007-03-28T15:50:00.000-04:00

In an attempted spoof on the Crisis of Infinite Earths, I decided to remake myself...in each of the many infinite Earths. Here are a few silly examples --

Earth 1 – Matthew Newman – b. 1953 – Matthew Newman was born of Howard and Cindy Newman, country folk from the capital district of New York State. He was the eldest of four children; Emily (1955), Alex (1957), Anna (1960). In 1970, Newman decided he would attend college. He told his parents that he would pay his own way through it entirely and he did, incurring a great deal of debt as he got his Bachelors of Science in Chemistry from Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute.

Newman was picked up straight out of college in 1974 by General Electric’s new silicone plant in Waterford, New York. He quickly flew up the ranks and by 1978 was manager of half of the factory. In 1976, Newman married his college girlfriend Jennifer Brandice, a native New Yorker who studied teaching at Russell Sage College for women.

In 1980, Newman was approached by the Republican Party in Waterford. They needed a bold candidate for City Council, one who would resonate as a hard working gentleman. They felt that Newman fit that description. He ran against 4 term incumbent John Baldwin and beat him by a two percent margin. Newman served for 4 years and was asked by the GOP in Waterford to run for Mayor, he accepted. His hard working appeal continued to do him justice, sweeping him into Office in 1984.

After serving for a term and a half, Newman quit his job at General Electric officially and ran for State Senator in 1990. He fought a difficult primary match-up against local-boy Joseph Bruno and won by a hair. He took the Republican and Conservative lines. Using both lines to his advantage, he swept into office by a larger margin. The State Senate was an interesting place for Newman, who was not used to the politics on a State level. He found himself more at odds with the Republican Party with each passing day as the memory of Rockefeller was ringing true making many Republicans act more and more like the Democrats. In 1994, George Pataki was running for Governor of the State of New York, he claimed to be a strong conservative Republican who would push for tax-cuts. Also running was wealthy businessman Thomas Golisano. Both men promised tax-relief and both men promised a more conservative agenda. Staying true to his party, Newman backed Pataki and was tapped as such to be his Lieutenant Governor. With the power of Newman from upstate, they defeated Mario Cuomo in quite the upset election.

Newman served as Lt. Governor and watched as Pataki’s views shifted from the Conservative he claimed to be to a more liberal candidate. In 1998, Newman had enough and challenged Pataki to a primary for the Conservative and Republican lines. Thomas Golisano was planning to run once more and surprising most of the State of New York, backed Newman helping him garner the support of the third largest party in the state, the Independence Party. Newman fought a hard primary, defeating Pataki on the Conservative line and barely losing the Republican line. Democratic challenger Peter Vallone attacked Pataki, citing the division in the Republican Party as proof that he did not have what it took to be Governor. Newman kept on issue saying that Pataki failed to cut taxes and failed to bring about the smaller government agenda he promised. The election was one of the closest in New York State history -- Pataki 35.09%, Vallone 28.80%, Newman 35.23%.

With this victory in hand for the conservative movement in New York, Newman pushed for lower taxes immediately. He cut spending everywhere in his first attempt at the budget leading to strong opposition within the Republican ranks who had supported Pataki in 1998. He barely got a budget passed in 1999 and in 2000 the State Government shut down for 3 days before the legislature was forced through the media frenzy to support Governor Newman’s budget. Over the course of 2 years, he cut spending 25% and in his first week in office cut out 10,000 state jobs.

Newman continued his large-scale cuts all across the budget throughout his first term in office. In 2000, he stayed out of the Republican primary saying, “I pray that whomever is elected is a truly conservative choice who plans is serious about cuts government spending.” He spoke to uproarious applause at the Republican National Convention. Disappointment struck the Republican Party with the election of Vice President Gore in 2000.

In 2001, tragedy struck in the wave of a terrorist attack on New York City. Citizens of New York became global citizens, Giuliani became America’s mayor, Newman became America’s Governor. He forced a small enough budgetary increase to pay for the rebuilding of the City and sent in a portion of the State Militia, which had begun being rebuilt in 2000. In 2002, Newman was easily reelected taking nearly 60% of the popular vote and taking the Republican, Independence, and Conservative lines.

In 2004, the Republican Party needed a strong candidate for President. They found that in Newman. He challenged everything Gore stood for ranging from his response to September 11^th to his failure to act on the growing problems with Iraq and Iran. Newman ran a fiery campaign with maverick Republican Senator John McCain as his running mate. He defeated President Gore by 1% of the popular vote and by capturing the State of New York.

Newman is the current President of Earth 1.

Here's another --

Earth 3 – Matthew Neuman – b. 1962 – Neuman was born in the New York of two Soviet spies, Svet-lana and Siergei “Neuman.” They had survived being ousted in the nation after McCarthy and had remained hidden in New York as parents of two children, Emily (1960) and Matthew, they went by the names of Howland and Cindy. The two taught their children to speak fluent Russian and English. In 1971, the couple was found and forced to flee back to the Soviet Union. Neuman, a fast and nimble child, was taken in by the KGB. He was trained as a child in the art of combat while learning about the menace of America and other problems in the world. Neuman became the perfect member of the KGB and at 17, he was dropped into Afghanistan. He was sent on a mission to assassinate the current leadership. He was armed to the teeth, but was sent alone.

He was quick to the task and within a week returned to Moscow a hero inside of the KGB and unknown outside of it. He led troops across the Soviet Empire and in 1985; he was promoted within the organization. He was a quick learner of the politics of the KGB and by 1990 was second only to the head of the Soviet Empire. Yet, in 1992 that Empire fell. Neuman went into hiding for 5 years and in 1997 appeared in the People’s Republic of China. The government used him as a consultant for their secret police and, despite his Russian heritage, he was treated with a great deal of respect. He served in that position until 2000 when he was found by the Russian government. They forced the Chinese to hand over Neuman to the United Nations who put him on trial for crimes against humanity. With no proof of his wrongdoings, as the bulk of KGB documentation relating to Neuman had been destroyed, he was released in 2002

He joined the Russian Communist Party and attempted to help their candidates. In 2003, he took a bullet for their Presidential candidate. This was his last act of patriotism for the Soviet cause, for the bullet killed Neuman.

He's the Fastest Thing Alive

2007-03-21T15:18:00.000-04:00

Is anyone else but me incredibly excited about the entire Sonic the Hedgehog animated series coming to DVD next Tuesday?

History of Popular Music 1984-2006 Compiled by Weird Al Yankovic

2007-03-09T14:11:00.000-05:00

Something I came to the realization of...was that if you follow the songs utilized in the polka tracks from Weird Al Yankovic, it would basically create a brief history of popular music. Here's a nice timeline of songs included --

The format used here is Year - Album - Title of Track - "Listing of songs" by Artist
1984 - "Weird Al" Yankovic in 3D - Polkas on 45 - "Jocko Homo" by Devo; "Smoke on the Water" by Deep Purple; "Sex (I'm A...)" by Berlin; "Hey Jude" by The Beatles; "L.A. Woman" by The Doors; "In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida" by Iron Butterfly; "Hey Joe" by Jimi Hendrix; "Burning Down the House" by Talking Heads; "Hot Blooded" by Foreigner; "Bubbles In The Wine" by Lawrence Welk; "Every Breath You Take" by The Police; "Should I Stay Or Should I Go" by The Clash; "Jumpin' Jack Flash" by The Rolling Stones; "My Generation" by The Who.
1985 - Dare To Be Stupid - Hooked on Polka - "12th Street Rag" by Euday L. Bowman; "State Of Shock" by The Jacksons With Mick Jagger; "Sharp Dressed Man" by ZZ Top; "What's Love Got to Do with It?" by Tina Turner; "Method Of Modern Love" by Hall & Oates; "Owner Of A Lonely Heart" by Yes; "We're Not Gonna Take It" by Twisted Sister; "99 Luftballons" by Nena; "Footloose" by Kenny Loggins; "The Reflex" by Duran Duran; "Metal Health (Bang Your Head)" by Quiet Riot; "Relax" by Frankie Goes to Hollywood.
1986 - Polka Party! - Polka Party! - "Sledgehammer" by Peter Gabriel; "Sussudio" by Phil Collins; "Party All the Time" by Eddie Murphy; "Say You, Say Me" by Lionel Richie; "Freeway of Love" by Aretha Franklin; "What You Need" by INXS; "Harlem Shuffle" by The Rolling Stones originally by Bob & Earl; "Venus" by Bananarama originally by Shocking Blue; "Nasty" by Janet Jackson; "Rock Me Amadeus" by Falco; "Shout" by Tears for Fears; "Papa Don't Preach" by Madonna
1989 - UHF Original Motion Picture Soundtrack and Other Stuff - The Hot Rocks Polka - "It's Only Rock'n Roll (But I Like It);" "Brown Sugar;" "You Can't Always Get What You Want;" "Honky Tonk Women;" "Under My Thumb;" "Ruby Tuesday;" "Miss You;" "Sympathy for the Devil;" "Get off of My Cloud;" "Shattered;" "Let's Spend the Night Together;" "(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction" all of which are by The Rolling Stones
1992 - Off the Deep End - Polka Your Eyes Out - "Cradle Of Love" by Billy Idol; "Tom's Diner" by Suzanne Vega; "Love Shack" by The B-52's; "Pump Up The Jam" by Technotronic; "Losing My Religion" by R.E.M.; "Unbelievable" by EMF; "Do Me!" by Bell Biv DeVoe; "Enter Sandman" by Metallica; "The Humpty Dance" by Digital Underground; "Cherry Pie" by Warrant; "Miss You Much" by Janet Jackson; "I Touch Myself" by Divinyls; "Dr. Feelgood" by Mötley Crüe; "Ice Ice Baby" by Vanilla Ice
1993 - Alapalooza - Bohemian Polka - Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen
1996 - Bad Hair Day - The Alternative Polka - "Loser" by Beck; "Sex Type Thing" by Stone Temple Pilots; "All I Wanna Do" by Sheryl Crow; "Closer" by Nine Inch Nails; "Bang And Blame" by R.E.M.; "You Oughta Know" by Alanis Morissette; "Bullet With Butterfly Wings" by Smashing Pumpkins; "My Friends" by Red Hot Chili Peppers; "I'll Stick Around" by Foo Fighters; "Black Hole Sun" by Soundgarden; "Basket Case" by Green Day
1999 - Running with Scissors - Polka Power! - "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls; "Flagpole Sitta" by Harvey Danger; "Ghetto Supastar (That Is What You Are)" by Pras, Ol' Dirty Bastard & Mýa; "Everybody (Backstreet's Back)" by the Backstreet Boys; "Walkin' on the Sun" by Smash Mouth; "Intergalactic" by the Beastie Boys; "Tubthumping" by Chumbawamba; "Ray of Light" by Madonna; "Push" by Matchbox Twenty; "Semi-Charmed Life" by Third Eye Blind; "The Dope Show" by Marilyn Manson; "MMMBop" by Hanson; "Sex and Candy" by Marcy Playground; "Closing Time" by Semisonic
2003 - Poodle Hat - Angry White Boy Polka - "Last Resort" by Papa Roach; "Chop Suey!" by System of a Down; "Get Free" by The Vines; "Hate to Say I Told You So" by The Hives; "Fell in Love with a Girl" by The White Stripes; "Last Nite" by The Strokes; "Down with the Sickness" by Disturbed; "Renegades of Funk" by Rage Against the Machine, originally by Afrika Bambaataa; "My Way" by Limp Bizkit; "Outside" by Staind; "Bawitdaba" by Kid Rock; "Youth of the Nation" by P.O.D. "The Real Slim Shady" by Eminem
2006 - Straight Outta Lynnwood - Polkarama! - "Let's Get It Started" by The Black Eyed Peas; "Take Me Out" by Franz Ferdinand; "Beverly Hills" by Weezer; "The Nina Bobina Polka" by "Weird Al" Yankovic; "Speed of Sound" by Coldplay; "Float On" by Modest Mouse; "Feel Good Inc." by Gorillaz & De La Soul; "Don't Cha" by The Pussycat Dolls & Busta Rhymes; "Somebody Told Me" by The Killers; "Slither" by Velvet Revolver; "Candy Shop" by 50 Cent & Olivia; "Drop It Like It's Hot" by Snoop Dogg & Pharrell; "Pon de Replay" by Rihanna; "Gold Digger" by Kanye West & Jamie Foxx.

And there you have it -- a history of popular music from 1984 to present based completely on the polka tracks from Weird Al's albums. Enjoy...

Fergie

2007-03-08T11:50:00.000-05:00

Stacey Ferguson, AKA Fergie, has found herself a musical niche. Here's what each one of her songs are composed of --

Black Eyed Peas style beats, many of which prepared by members of BEP
Her, or someone else, spelling the title of the song OR some other word which relates to the title of the song
Her saying, "Check it out"
Repeating the title of the song
A cameo by will.i.am

And that's the formula for a Fergie song. Sounds like a simplistic criticism? That's what you get for simplistic music.

Snakes on a Plane II: Dinner's Served

2007-03-08T08:34:00.000-05:00

Here's an article about an entire army of snakes which were almost...on a plane. I call it, Snakes on a Plane II: Dinner's Served. While I'm thinking about it, here's my original Snakes on a Plane movie review as found at my primary blog. Enjoy...

HT to Jen

Ten Favorite Albums of All Time

2007-02-26T14:47:00.000-05:00

I was listening to a great deal of music on the ride back from Baltimore this past week and realized how much music I truly loved. Then I began to wonder -- what were my favorite albums of all time. These aren't necessarily the best albums, the most earth shattering -- just my favorite pieces of music that I could listen to over and over again. I narrowed it down to 10 albums. Here they are in no particular order.

Beck - Mutations -- Mutations is an album very unlike any other album I have ever heard. It combines elements of electronic, folk, rock, alternative, country, and even classical music into this strange compilation that only Beck could create. I'll be honest, my copy of this CD has started to have frayed edges for how often I used to listen to this music. It may lack the major hits of some of his other albums, like Odelay or Midnight Vultures, but what it lacks in radio play it more than makes up for in amazing music. It's the type of music that could sit in the background as mood music, a soundtrack to your life in almost any mood your in. Mind you, I still don't think I understand any of the lyrics on any of the tracks for this album -- but I think that happens to me no matter which Beck album I'm discussing. It's a great album and it's worth listening to if you like any genre of music, period.
Smash Mouth - Fush Yu Mang -- Despite the fact that the title of the album is a slurred version of the F-you as said by Al Pacino in Scarface, this album still rocks my socks off this many years later. Written at a time before Smash Mouth had become happy-go-lucky in their lives with the success of this album and the insane success of the song All Star, these songs were real about their lives at the times and have elements that are both foreign and relatable to most people. It is upbeat with almost a Beach Boys' feel at times -- and other times somber and reflective, yet always containing these fun, ska and punk tunes making it accessible to anyone. Mind you, I wouldn't allow my children listen to this album with the language and content of the lyrics -- but for those mature enough to hear it, this album can be fun, introspective, and just a pleasure to the ears.
Jay-Z - The Black Album -- If Extreme Behavior is one of the most perfect rock albums I've heard in a long time, The Black Album is one of the epitome of what a rap album should be. Something most don't realize about Jay-Z is that instead of discussing gang-banging and how great it is today, Jay-Z discusses his life, how great its been since he raised himself up, and his family. This isn't gangsta rap, this is real rap about life and it's amazing. Jay-Z shows himself through in each and every track, with each track produced expertly with really great beats and powerful vocals. It's not often that you hear a rap album that's this good that really makes you say, "Wow, this is great music." This is one of those albums and deserves to be in the top list of any music connoisseur.
Toby Keith - Greatest Hits 2 -- Now, I didn't think that I would actually be willing to post a greatest hits album in my top list -- but let's be reasonable, this is the best that Toby Keith has to offer. It's got his fun songs like "How Do You Like Me Now" and a live version of "You Ain't Much Fun," while including some of his best slow tunes like "My List" and "You Shouldn't Kiss Me Like That." This album also includes some great original songs, despite what the likes of AllMusic has to say about it -- plus it includes the popular "Courtesy of the Red, White, and Blue" which, when you listen to the lyrics, has NOTHING to do with the Iraqi war and everything to do with September 11th and how each and every one of us as Americans felt after that tragic event happened, "You hurt us, and we will make sure that you pay for your crimes."
Jack's Mannequin - Everything in Transit -- This is the band and album that makes me wish beyond belief that Andrew McMahon never returns to the band Something Corporate. Jack's Mannequin is basically the Andrew McMahon show -- he wrote and produced this album. The entire album discusses a summer after he returns home from a great deal of touring with Something Corporate and was now on his own. He actually spent some $40,000 of his own money to put this album together before Maverick Records picked it up. This is the story of a man -- and the passion and personal feeling shines through in each and every single track of this album. If you go into it looking for the pop punk of Something Corporate, go away -- this is a piano based rock album more along the lines of Meat Loaf than Something Corporate. Basically, I'd say this is an amazing album and worth every single cent that I spent on it.
The Beatles - 1 -- Ok, apparently I'm a liar, I put two greatest hits albums on here already. The Beatles' 1 spans decades of number one hits from them to bring only the best and classic hits that you can sing along to even if you didn't know it was The Beatles who sang them to begin with. I don't really know what else to say about this album beyond just that.
Hinder - Extreme Behavior -- Fastly becoming one of my favorite albums is this, the first major album from Hinder. Ignore what the critics say about this album, as usual the critics are idiots. The album contains everything a rock album needs to be perfect -- hard rocking tunes, a few power ballads, and great music all around. Honestly, it is one of the first major pure rock albums I've heard in a long time, and it's perfectly fit into that genre. I would say this about the album -- it's the perfect breakup album. This band must have had a great many bad relationships, because it shows in some of the lyrics. And yet, the music is able to span the beautifully melodic to the harder rock that many on the radio want to hear. All in all, this is a great album -- if not friendly for the kids.
Meat Loaf - Bat Out of Hell -- This is the perfect Meat Loaf album. Written entirely by Jim Steinman, this album contains nothing but amazing music. "You Took The Words Right Out of My Mouth," "For Crying Out Loud," and "Heaven Can Wait" top this groundbreaking album that borderlines on the verge of being a rock opera. It's an amazing album that really should be everyone's musical collection. It's such a classic that I'm really not sure what else to say about this besides get this album and you will not be disappointed.
OutKast - Speakerboxx/The Love Below -- The second album in the hip-hop category on this list, Speakerboxx/The Love Below is amazing. The album is divided in two, we have the Big Boi half and the Andre 3000 half of the album which allowed each of them to take all manner of musical risks individually while still keeping that OutKast feel. Big Boi's half is perhaps some of the best rap music I've heard of all time; it has amazing beats, great lyrics that flow off the tongue, and varying messages from discussion of love to politics and it never goes stale. Andre 3000's half of the album is insane, ranging from funk rock to hip hop to classical pop hits in line with Michael Jackson, before he became creepy. It's a great album set that makes hip hop accessible to anyone.
Billy Joel - The Stranger -- If you want to hear some of the best music written by Bill Joel, look no further than The Stranger. It may not contain some of the hits like "Piano Man," but what it does have is amazing -- "The Stranger," "Movin' Out (Anthony's Song)," and "Scenes from an Italian Restaurant." This album can be fun, romantic, introspective, and basically everything you can ask for out of Billy Joel -- it's all here. It's another classic along the lines of Meat Loaf's Bat Out of Hell that I really don't know what else to say about it -- the album is great and well worth the price of admission.

On a side note, many of these albums contain lyrics which are not good for children so, before you go running out to pick up some of these great albums -- check them out for yourself or at least make certain there's no parental advisory label before playing them in front of your children. I'm sure you all have different opinions on songs, etc -- and feel free to post them here.

Sigdon Riley

2007-02-09T13:43:00.000-05:00

Sigdon Riley is a new character I may be playing in a Dungeon's and Dragons game with BM2, JB. It's set in the world of Greyhawk, of which you can learn more about here. Here's the biography of the character that I've put together --

Sigdon Riley was born of noble parents. Money was his life and it was a good life indeed. He was trained to be a noble fighter by his wealthy father, learning all the niceties of high society. He had it all and at 21, he married the beautiful, 17 year old Mary Ann Crone. Riley loved his rich and fulfilling life, but all that changed in an instant.

On Sigdon's 25th birthday, his father passed away in the middle of the night of unknown causes. Unbeknown to Sigdon, his father carried a great deal of debt which had brought him to his current station in life -- primarily to two notorious underworld bosses, a half Drow named Jarl and a hot-tempered human by the name of Hunter Davis. Upon his father's death, Sigdon's mother disappeared with Jarl -- the two had been holding a secret romantic affair for the past ten years. Along with her went half of Sigdon's family fortune -- all to Jarl and all not enough to finish repaying his father's debt.

Sigdon fled town with his pregnant wife, hoping to find refuge with what little money he could carry a town or so away. Upon reaching the nearby village of Blackstone, Mary Ann gave birth to her first child -- a half-elf. Neither Mary Ann nor Sigdon were elven. Upset, confused, and angry, Sigdon decided he was going to leave his cheating wife and the offspring of that unholy union when suddenly, his father's debt caught up to him. Hunter Davis and his men had caught Sigdon, beat him, and enslaved him. Mary Ann was taken as Davis' own, a new member of his ever growing menagerie of concubines. Sigdon never saw Mary again.

After four years of brutal enslavement in the Underdark, Riley could take no more. He exploded on two slavers one day in an insane, berserk rage slaughtering the two men. Using his chains as a makeshift weapon, Riley fought his way to Davis, freeing any slave he found along the way. Riley and his small band of hungry slaves overpowered Davis, savagely killing him.

Riley could never go back to civilized life after that. He lived on his own in the wilderness, traveling from town to town attacking slavers as he found them. He tracked a certain slaver band to the Shackled City, which is currently where his full story will begin...

Poetry from Class

2007-02-06T14:10:00.000-05:00

I wrote this while sitting in Molecular Biology I today. It is an interesting take on my feelings and is barely following a particular rhyming scheme.

Tell me how to feel
Tell me how to heal
How am I to know just what to do
I'm looking for direction
A greater plan for my selection
By the world to get a job like all of you

I want a job
Don't want a career
I need something that keeps me near
To my love
Gives family time
I need a plan that will provide for me and mine.

I sit here in class
Hoping just to pass
And leave all of this behind
I think of my life
Of my family and strife
Of my future and my wife
And so I find

That I want a job
Don't want a career
I need some way to keep me near
To those that I love
Gives that family time
I need a plan for me and mine

I need a plan to let me know
What I need to do so
I can graduate in May...
What to do so I will find
A job that will ease my mind
And help melt my cares away

In the future I will be
A grown man with a family
That for I will need to provide
Yes monetarily
But also lovingly
And the only way to abide

Is to find a job
Not a career
Something which will keep me near
To those I love
Give me family time
I need a plan for me and mine
To find a job
That's all I say
Not a career which takes me away
From my family fun
My beloved ones
With a career I'd be married more than once
Wedding both my wife and job is nuts
I can't imaging loving a job with a larger part
Than the one for othse who occupy my heart.

Chapter One Preview

2007-01-08T11:04:00.000-05:00

As I mentioned on my primary blog, I'm in the process of writing a book. It will take me quite some time, especially considering that I don't write on a daily basis, but I hope that it will be completed by the close of 2007. Here is a preview of a section of Chapter 1, which will almost be a biography-esque chapter --

...But what else has happened in the life of Matthew Newman? I was a dork my entire life. While some children yearn to be astronauts, superheroes, or firefighters; I was playing with my “Too Gross” mad scientist set saying that I wanted to be a scientist when I grew up. In elementary and middle school we learned about the sciences in lumps, with little to no rhyme or reason behind anything. We'd talk about dinosaurs and fossils one week, followed by a simple chemical experiment. Throughout that time I learned all about mathematics, I absorbed it and when I began to learn algebra in seventh grade, I was enthralled. To me, math had always been like a puzzle – one which I actually had enjoyed doing, unlike those ridiculous piece puzzles that showed pictures of puppies or famous works of art. With the realization that I loved math combined with the fact that I was really good at it, I decided that I wanted to find a way to merge my love of math into my love of science that I carried on from childhood.

In high school we began to delve more deeply into the specific sciences and continue my diving into mathematics. The first of my high school scientific explorations was earth science, or as I liked to call it “Rocks 101.” We learned about rocks of all shapes and sized, we learned about how the rocks were formed, and so on. It was the most boring class I believe I've ever taken and I've taken years of math courses during my undergraduate career. My sophomore year we learned about biology. I thought this would be interesting, but the memorization was all manner of irritating. It did not feel like a science class as nothing appeared to be quantified; everything was observational with little to no structure. I hated it, despite doing well in the course. Following that came the science I had always dreamed of, chemistry. I became enthralled by chemistry; it was a science that I could understand, that was straightforward and easily accessible to one who could figure out patterns, and it was incredibly quantitative. I loved it, so much so that I took physics the following year merely to build a better foundation for my chemistry knowledge. I knew that this was the type of scientist I wanted to be when I grew up – I wanted to be a chemist.

At seventeen, I began looking into colleges. Being the valedictorian of my class, I knew I could get into most universities, but first I needed to know how I would use my love of chemistry to get a job in the real world beyond my schooling. I looked into the chemistry related fields and found chemical engineering – the application of chemistry, commonly in industrial settings. It sounded magical, perfect even. I said to myself, “I'll take it.” I applied all across New York being accepted into all five of the schools I applied. In the end, my school decision came down to money and name recognition, which led me back to the city I was born, Troy, and Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute (RPI).